little things

I am grateful for little things.
For my yellow house.
For my pumpkin patch.
For my stupid Dog who is so gentle.
For my daughters..
One who is full of love for People.
and
One who is full of questions about life.
For my friends.
For my family...because I am not alone.
For my feather blanket.
For socks when my feet get cold.
For Christmas...because our savior came...And Easter, because our salvation was complete.
For my home church and all the good people there.
For being able to stay home to raise my kids.
For my van...even though my digital readout is spotty and my interior lights don't work.
For my ability to get my kids presents.
For my the 22 lb turkey in my fridge waiting to get baked.
For my health.
For my breath..
For my life.
For each minute I get to be here, when so many people don't.
For each heartbreak.
For each happy moment.
For all the little things.
God Bless and Happy Thanksgiving.
From the Oursler Family.

Rituals or Habits....

Or whatever you call them..
Hey all, I had a pretty good week.
I exercised very consistently and am implementing a new toning regimen so that I don't burn out on exercise.
I am trying to  make exercise a part of my life that is livable for the rest of my life.
Just like I am trying to make eating well a kind of habit.
OR ritual.
Whatever you want to call it...
I get the word 'ritual' from Tony Robbins.
He seems to be a love him or hate him type of guy.
I am actually neither.
lol.
I rarely Love Love or hate hate very many people.
I reserve it for people I know well.
So I observe him as a rather interesting fellow.
A person who says thing s that are fairly obvious but that we somehow forget to do..
Things like:
Do the small things and the large things will get in line.
Focus.
What you focus on is important.
HE does a little exercise where he says
Okay...turn around...find every brown thing in your line of sight...
brown brown brown...
do this for thirty seconds...
got it..
now really do it...look around and look for brown stuff...
I'll wait.
.
.
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.
.
.
.
.
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.
.
Now...
Name every red thing you saw.
You don't remember any red things?
Right,
because you were focusing on brown.
The same goes for what you focus on daily.
Focus on fear, you'll be fearful.
Focus on gratitude you will be grateful.
etc.
He does  little exercises where you think of things you are grateful for for a period of time....
then he wants you to note how your body is positioned...
Then he wants you to think of a time you were sad  or failed.
IT's so when you need it, you can change your physiology to change your state of mind.
Which I do believe can work.
But physiology and changing your tape alone are not enough.
You need to build underlying habits that support your goals.
For instance.
When I was big....262 lbs.
I had a habit of going through fast food drive thrus.
I had a habit of drinking a grande white mocha with whipped cream whenever I went to starbucks.
I had a habit of having seconds and thirds for dinner.
I had a habit of watching television.
I had a habit of wearing clothes with no zippers.
Now that I am smaller
I don't go through fast food drive thrus.
I drink a tall americano with splenda
I have firsts...and that is all.
I cancelled my cable.
I have pants with a size in them.
I exercise daily...
before I never exercised.
Change your habits, change your life.

I am your constant companion.

I am your greatest helper or heaviest burden.
I will push you onward or drag you down to failure.
I am completely at your command.

Half of the things you do you might as well turn over to me and I will do them - quickly and correctly.

I am easily managed - you must be firm with me.
Show me exactly how you want something done and after a few lessons, I will do it automatically.

I am the servant of great people,
and alas, of all failures as well.
Those who are great, I have made great.
Those who are failures, I have made failures.

I am not a machine though
I work with the precision of a machine
plus the intelligence of a person.

You may run me for profit or run me for ruin -
it makes no difference to me.

Take me, train me, be firm with me, and
I will place the world at your feet.

Be easy with me and I will destroy you.

Who am I? I am Habit.

Tomorrow I will talk about the Time Factor.

Chris out.

Zumba...

I tried it.
It was fun.
I went with my friend brooke.
She is the same person I climbed the cog railway with..
you know,  you have all sorts of friends.
Friends that you talk with..
friends that you get advice from..
and then you have friends who say things like..
"Hey, let's go run with the Bulls."
That's brooke.

I am one of those people who likes to try new things as long as I don't have to think of them.
So...I would say
"You really want to do that?"
They'd say yes..
and I would say "well, I'll give it a go."
lol.
And I did.
showed up and she gets right in the front.
of course.
big ole mirrors.
And the lady doing the class busts out that kid and play stuff from the nineties...
yo yo.
stay in place running.
I was all H*ll no.
but I got into it..
the only time I actually felt ridiculous was when she had us put our hands behind our head and do  pelvic thrusts.
and I almost wussed out.
Till I looked five peeps over and saw two 70 year old ladies burning it down.
And then I thought.
ohhhkay.
If they can, I can.
Apparently there is a zumba thon next saturday...
Think I will drop in on that.
do an hour to an hour and a half  or so. lol.
Can't hurt.
calories in and good.
exercise in and good.
Have a great day.  

Great New Blog...

Hey guys...check this blog out....
http://changeisimminent.blogspot.com/2011/11/2048.html?showComment=1321130653427#c9136045836924240019

Change is imminent...this person just started and they need some support! They don't seem to have a follower button...But you could encourage them to add one! We all need all the help we can get. Have a great day.
Chris out.

What wondrous love is this?

oh my soul oh my soul...
I was watching this and it occurred to me that today is veteran's day....
The lord lying in the arms of his mother...after fighting the good fight and overcoming death.
It reminds me of course, of the men and women who have died and the many empty arms of mothers and fathers...
And wives, and husbands, and children.
and brother's sisters and friends....
What manner of love resides inside the man or woman who lays down their life for their friend, their family, and their country. 
Or the man or woman willing to should the need arise.
A wondrous love.
Worthy of reverence.
For that I thank them.
On this veteran's day.

Chris out.

let go of lies and fear...and embracing life.

I would say of all the songs I heard on the radio when I was growing up...this is the one I remember playing over and over...and it is something that you don't understand when you are younger.

When you are young...this feeling is natural..
You feel sure of yourself.
You haven't lived long enough to really mess up.
To have regrets.
To be second guessed...
To have your mistakes effect the lives of others.
To be afraid.

On the other hand, when you are a child you are still held back by circumstances...
you are trained to set limits on what you can and can't do.
In a healthy environment..the limits are for a child's own good.
In a toxic environment, the limitations are a manifestation of a parent's own lack of self esteem and self percieved shortcomings...and when those people have children, even if they don't intend it..
they pass these self imposed limitations on to their children...
I have many positive things from my mother...
A 'no quit' attitude.
I learned to never complain, and to work hard.
I learned to be honest with myself and others.

and believe it or not, I have developed many good character traits from living with an abusive father.
I learned to seperate my worth from another's opinion or actions.
I learned that whatever anyone thinks of my worth as a human being, my worth is not weighed by the value placed on me by the people who surround me.
My value is based on God's love for me.
That makes me a person of infinite worth.
But,
I also developed self limiting beliefs...
Coming out of high school...there was the belief that college was for rich kids.
That a career in the arts was not a 'real job'.
For anything to be a real job, it had to be boring and hard and pay for shit.
I was taught that being feminine was 'wussy'.
To be 'equal' you had to be 'tough'.
So many of these things went against my true nature, that I supressed myself.
I am, by nature, a very sensitive person.
I like people.
For who they are...not the clothes they wear, not for the job they have or the car they drive...or the age they have attained or haven't attained.
In my mind, when I am looking at someone...whether it's an adult or a child...I see an individual and approach them that way.
YOu won't find me talking down to a child, or an elderly person, or a homeless person.
When I talk to people I want to hear from their heart and mind.
I want to know who they are...
And I want to judge them on their spirit....not their social status.
I do not feel the need to be validated in my life choices by people who have made similar life choices.

This makes me (and has made me) very different than many people over the years.
So I don't always  fit  in social settings.
I have never, not once wanted to discuss whether my car had a leather interior.
When the wholesale condemnation of an entire people group or activity comes winging my way in a conversation, I do my best to duck.
For by what measure you judge, you will be judged.
I always keep that in mind... cause I can just see jesus up there measuring out the judgement rod everytime I open my mouth to condemn someone...(he was a carpenter)

But I have learned to accept that not everyone approaches life this way.
The one good thing my childhood did for me was to teach me to differentiate between someone's opinion or perception of a situation..
and reality.
I learned early that another's opinion was just that..an opinion.
Or to use a crass phrase that was flung around my house:
"Opinions are like @ssholes, everyone has one."
What hurts my heart is to see other people accept the opinion of others as a correct one in spite of that person's own perception or grasp on a situation.
I have some relatives like this.
They are very sensitive, and take everything people say to heart.
Even if that person whose gums are flapping isn't worth spit.
I've seen it on blogs.
People popping off and laying down their version of the law when they have no concept of someone else's reality.
Compassion rarely fails.
Listening rather than talking will save you major embarrasment nearly every time it is tried.
So I am letting go of some lies I have held on to...
Lies and fears implanted in me by people who have their own opinions and limitations.
I can have a career in Art.
Being feminine doesn't mean you aren't strong.
Not caring about money is okay.
I can be as organized or disorganized as I want to be, I am not 'naturally disorganized'..organization is a skill, so I will achieve this skill.
My beginning doesn't determine my ending.
Other people's life decisions don't affect me...therefore they are none of my business and I won't discuss them.
I can learn to play the piano or learn to dance ballet whenever the frick I want...you don't have to be 10 years old to take lessons.
What are some lies that you have taken as your truth?
Even though, deep down you know it isn't you?
I was thinking...I am halfway to dead...37 years old.
How much of my life do I want to spend making other people comfortable?
How much time do I want to spend validating someone else's opinion or life choice at the expense of my own truth and happiness?
And how much do I want to spend being truly happy.
I say the rest of it.
Whatever I have.
Whatever God gives me.
Chris out.

Now let's see the Christmas decorations....

Okay, Now that halloween is out of the way, I can stand the sight of Christmas trees. I don't know why these people feel the need to break this stuff out mid september...marketing I guess.

It's november...this year has gone by quickly.
I have been doing alright with hottification...but have realized something.
I have gone too long with a kind of diet mentality...
In that I still eat outside of what the kids eat...
and since my husband is dieting (and doing very well I might add)
Its us two and those two...
I guess I am just sick of feeling like I have to get somewhere quickly when there is no such rush.
When I started I was content to get to a great weight slowly..
Somewhere around the last 20 lbs you lose your mind and want it quickly..
and this is where a lot of people seem to flub up.,
Instead of letting it come off like the rest came off.
Instead of seeing it as a permanant change..
You lose your MIND and think...If I just cut it to 1400 and exercise 6 days a week....I will be there in thus and such a time.
(you know, that mentality that caused you to FAIL so many times before.)
Instead of saying...okay, let's focus on how I intend to eat and exercise for the rest of my life.
every set back can be viewed as a failure.
oy.
I am still learning.
learning how to eat like a normal person.
I am still using that night creme for wrinkles and it seems to work.
I am just focusing on integrating my life and my eating and my exercising.
I know I will never have a perfect balance..
But I also know that you have to shake up the exercise and eating everyonce in a while or you will die of boredom.

So, I am getting there.
Hope all of you are doing well.
Chris out.