The art of weightloss...

Good brother, I couldn't come up with a decent title tonight if My life depended on it...
I have a ton to talk about...but really can't fit it all into one post.

1.)  I had a great night at the gym-728 calories burned on Arnold....200 situps done.

2.)  I am sitting at 179 at night on the scale.  Not sure why...I am probably much lower in the morning....
I haven't weighed myself in the morning for at least a week.  But on the positive side...I am in the 170's.
Period. At night and in the morning.  In a couple more pounds....7 at most...I'll have lost 90 lbs.
That's alot.

3.)  Art....I have a lot to say....

4.) organization....I wanted to thank Loretta for her wonderful email regarding what she does....I would also like to thank everyone that gave such lovely responses to my post on my 'malfunction'.
I have decided to do a combination calendar with calendar notes section plus lists.

The calendar is great....I can see out for the next year...I can post daily calorie intakes and excercise burns and still fit food stuff...Each month has a two page spread plus a monthly notes section for each day. So, I can put stuff I need to get or buy in the daily notes section....note upcoming events in the calendar section...and then I bought skinny legal pads to write daily to do lists on....
I have a bill folder already....so I will just put what day I pay the bills on my calender, write when to pick up stamps also..and then put it on my to do list for the following day so I have stamps to pay the bills.  Also girl scouts, homeschooling..etc.  It will all fit on the calender book.  Well it actually says planner...but it's spiral bound and I got it at target. It also has a place in the front for phone numbers and the like....
Pretty cool....

Okay,
nOw what I really want to address tonight.
I am as conservative probably as they come.
But,  I have to say...there is this radio announcer who is verklempt because pink was PRACTICALLY NAKED when she did her grammy routine.

I watched that routine.
I thought it was beautiful... well done, tasteful..
She was expressing, through dance, through everything...that moment just before something anticipated happens.
This is where I think conservatives can come off the rails.

I saw what she was wearing...and you couldn't see anything...
Not a nipple in sight.
And quite frankly, even if there had been a nip slip...it was nowhere near as nasty and trashy as britney spears and madonna licking each other's tonsils fully clothed a couple years back.

The difference is in the intent.
She didn't wear that to be provocative...it's not her style...
She wore it to express what the song was about.
It's like ballet...nobody complains about the men in tights, even though you can practically see everything.
Because it isn't about that.
IT's about the beauty of the human form in motion.
OR
Nudes by Ruebens....
I can't imagine anybody thinking of porn when viewing paintings of the human form by Rueben's or botticelli...
And quite frankly Rich....you screeching into your microphone daily that Pink was
PRACTICALLY NAKED is annoying and ridiculous.
You remind me of fifth grade boys in the bathroom with a national geographic and a half smoked cigarette.
I think it says more about the mind of the person who is doing the viewing than the object or the performance being viewed....
So here it is...
You can view it if you haven't already...
Do you feel like it's dirty?
 I don't.
well,
out of time....
I have to go to bed.
I am going to try to hit some of the blogs I missed yesterday...
I guess it's a feeling of ANTICIPATION.
lol.
hugs,
Chris

Cookies cookies la la la....

Hey all,
I am soooo tired.
I slept like poo last night..maybe 2 or 3 hours and then was up this morning at 6 to get girl scout cookies...
75 cases (900 boxes) with my good friend and co leader Amber.
So there we were at 8:40 in the morning. 
A balmy 23 degrees.  It is snowing and the cookie drop is behind schedule. 45 minutes behind schedule.
So Amber and I made a survey of the cars and discovered much to our expectation surprise that there were two kinds of cars in the parking lot to pick up cookies.
One type was the mini van...
the other the suv.
That being said...I had a mini van and amber has an suv...lol.
I am not sure if it just goes along with the girl scout troop leader vibe. or what.
In any case....I walked 2 miles and ate 1500 calories..
I tend to eat more when I am tired.
I don't know why.
But I am about to go to sleep here...at 7:30 in the evening.
I have paid My oldest daughter money to read a story to her sister at 9:30 and make sure she gets to bed (my oldest is 16)
I am paying my younger daughter to stay in bed once in there and not make a fuss.
It is costing me $3.50 total.
Otherwise known as money well spent.
Sometimes a little bribery goes  a long way.
Signing off now,
Your tired and slightly poorer blogger,
Chris

The forest for the trees.....

Hey all,
I was listening to the radio today...and a couple of guys were talking about the wonderful properties of the English language...
It's precision is remarkable, they declared.
I thought and would have to say, I agree.
I think my post yesterday was NOT CLEAR.
I was expressing frustration...I think that was apparent.
But I feel like I gave the erroneous impression that it was all about my missed workout, or baking a cake. Probably because that was what I was babbling about. ;o)
My frustration stems solely from my seeming inability to pull my head out of my rear organization wise.
My frustration was not in driving to the roller rink, but in having to get gas before I went.
Not in buying kate a present, but in doing so...not only did I forget to pick up ice cream
I LOST MY DEBIT CARD...IN THE STORE...
And in doing so spent forty five minutes when I could have been picking up ice cream...on the phone to the bank cancelling my debit card.
So what does she get...
A cake that is poorly decorated because I didn't bake the cake till that morning, put the frosting on and then did a kind of Jackson pollacky thingy with the tubes of frosting I had...
I didn't even buy enough CANDLES.
Thank goodness the whole birthday didn't hinge on the cake..
It all hinged on the skating party...which was awesome.
But knowing that doesn't let me off the hook in my own mind.
This past 8 months was about alot more than just weight loss for me...
It's been my attempt at personal growth by forcing myself to 'grow up' and try new things.
Things like...
Be a girl scout troop leader...
I live in fear of failing bigtime.
I am going to post something about me that you all don't know.
I am actually on the autism spectrum....
My mom took me to a doctor in first grade because I was doing the whole spaced out rocking thing....
The doctor tried to explain it to my mom...however, she was incensed that she thought he was attempting to call me retarded when I 'could read on my own at age four'....
What she failed to understand is that people with milder forms of autism aren't 'retarded'
In fact, many are very, very bright.
My rocking was an attempt to soothe myself when I became overstimulated....
Which I tended to do in crowds or when there is a ton of activity.
I notice EVERYTHING.
I don't really have a filter.
When I was young, I would go into my head and do things like put together the eiffel tower in my head...I could actually see how the whole thing connected....and then I would draw what I saw in my head.
These days, I can feel myself begin to slip...When I feel like things are too much I start to go kind of daydreamy...but if I focus really hard I can pull my mind back in...
The only thing that really helped me growing up, was to draw or to read.
When I drew I could focus.  People are always saying how detailed my drawings are...
well, It calms me down to draw.
I read about it, and they talk about how some kids count....well, I drew.
I do it now in different ways.  I have learned to cope by focusing.  For instance...
At parties, I hone in on one person.
At girl scouts, I focus on going in order.....I focus one girl at a time.
I am great one on one....I have very good focus.
My trouble comes with juggling...I see so many people who are good at keeping all the balls in the air.
I have coped this year with home school by assigning hours to the school...between 9 and 1 I do school.
Then I clean for two hours.
Then  I blah blaah blah....
It really helps me.
I need a system to incorporate all the different aspects of my life and a way to say no to distractions.
I also need a way to relax.
The gym does not relax me.
Doing girl scouts does not relax me...
These things drain me. I do enjoy them because I am doing something I was afraid to do...something  I thought I couldn't...but that are worthwhile.
They are my personal challenges.
Especially girl scouts.
After I am done I need to lay down and sleep or to be by myself for an hour or two.
Don't get me wrong...I am greatful for this problem  because It has taught me that if you really try, if you really focus..you can over come things that other people might not think you can.
I am able to focus like nobody's business..
In doing so, I sometimes miss the forest for the trees.
I want to enjoy special days instead of missing them because my focus is all in one area, or i am running around because I failed to plan..therefore planned to fail.
So, I am thinking of maybe a calendar system to alert me four or five days out that something is coming.
Do any of you have good ways to organize yourselves?
I could use some good suggestions for an overall kind of system.I need to integrate everything...from housework, to homeschool to extracurricular activites, to working out and running errands.
I really want this in place, this organizational system..before the end of march..It was my one New Years eve resolution.
Things are cleaner in the house..because I assign two hour a day to doing housework...but I am no where near where I want to be  yet.
Well...I got my workout in, and burned 720 calories tonight.
I am also in under 1400 calories.
I hope you all had a successful day today.
Hugs,
Chris

Tempted to use profanity...

But I shall abstain.
Let's just say today DID NOT go like I wanted it to.
I was forced into corners left and right...and by the time I climbed out of them..
I didn't go to the gym.
I did spend 45 minutes on the phone at walmart with my bank cancelling my bank card.
Which I somehow managed to lose in the space of a 30 minute time frame.
I did spend one hour ferrying my daughter to a roller rink...30 more searching for parking, more hours making a cake., and helping my youngest pick out a present..all of which I loved.
I need to get used to the fact that party days are bad days to go to the gym.
I told my oldest that While today could be regarded as stellar in the birthday sense...
for me..
this day in dietopia never happened.

I can't wait for tomorrow..
back to the gym, back to my elliptical and back to my fat burning ways.
Food today.
yogurt
1 and 1/2 cups of spaghetti with a cup of sauce and meat.
1 cup of green beans
1 slice of chocolate cake.
I am somewhere around 1500 calories i think...
I didn't have a chance to eat through the middle of the day....
I ate breakfast..
then I ate at 8 o clock at night.
I don't want to talk about today.
I will be glad to put this in the dustbin of history.
My daughter had a great time with 7 of her friends at a roller rink.
She wanted a party with just her and her friends.
So..as tempted as I am to write today off...I am glad it happened.
Both now and 16 years ago, I am glad she had a great time.
I really need to organize my days better.
That is part of my problem.
As I recall, I didn't have time for much sixteen years ago today, either.
But as a result I have a lovely daughter.
One day won't kill me.

Have a good night all,
See you tomorrow.
Hugs,
Chris

Perfect 10 update...week 5...and a picture of my shirt...lol.

Hey all.
Well, Today was my high calorie day...it's a lone ranger this month.
I am only having one...
I did my workout. A 3.8 mile walk and an upper body workout.
Tomorrow it's back to the gym and one hour on Christian and situps.
My week went really really well for perfect 10/
I was in bed on time.
I ate my correct number of calories.
Since I started at 188...and am now 178, I already hit my 8 lb goal for the perfect 10.
Been drinking more than 8 cups every day this week.
Been getting at least one hour of cardio..and since I am doing every day in February, I got all my days in.
January was a really hard month for me. I was constantly hungry.
Glad it's over....
I tell you though.
Committing the first four days to really low calorie counts and strict exercising...
It has gotten me back on track. I feel capable of continuuing even though it is going to be harder to drop that final forty or so pounds.
I think mentally I checked out of the fight a bit.
Got a little happy with myself..
Clothes shopping and makeup wearing and the whole nine.
I had to really step back and take a good look at where I am and where I want to be...
I realized I simply wasn't there yet...so my little party had to go on hiatus.
That being said...

I have a couple of really cute outfits..

I had a nice date tonight with my husband.

It feels nice to look nice again.

It will feel even better to be where I want to be.

Now for the one thing about me ya'll don't know...
I was a sucky shot with the rifle in basic..
But when  it came to fire and maneuver I was crack.
I killed the enemy and we obtained our objective.
It was the most fun...(besides the bayonet course and the grenade portion)
that I had....
So, this blogger loves fire and maneuver...
I should've been a ranger.
Hugs and bullet casings,
Chris

Are you an Ameri-can or an Ameri-can't?!

Hey all,
Well, back to the gym today.
I didn't want to Go today.
But, I went anyway...
One hour on Arnold for a 679 calorie burn, then down to the exercise mat to do my sit-ups.
You see, I don't always want to be doing my workout.
Today was not an 'on fire' moment for me.
I got in there, I was tired starting.
I knew I needed to distract myself..so instead of listening to music,
I watched a Friends episode on one of the TV's they have placed around the gym.
It's the one where Rachel and Ross finally get back together after breaking up over the pros and cons list Ross wrote.
It was funny.
That lasted for quite a while, and then I finished out my workout on level 2.
Hence the lower than normal burn.
I walk down to the mat area.
I lay down.
And here is the conversation I had in my head.

"God , the ceiling is ugly."

"I don't want to do this."

"I don't want to exercise."

"Now I know why Jillian says she doesn't like to exercise."

"Now, Chris...Think of why you are doing this..."

"Okay, I exercise so I won't be fat, and so I can move around..."

'If I don't exercise, I will have to cut my food to portions that are ridiculous, just to lose weight!"

"I like food."

"If people only did what they wanted, the world would be a sorry place...this is why God gave us will power...to get us through the things we don't want to do."

"So,  let's get these situps started."

So I do one set of 65...25 regular sit ups, 20 obliques and 20 lower abdominal crunches...It hurts..

There is a creepy looking bald guy on the bicycle next to the mats.
I start to wonder why there are so many bald people at the gym.
I don't think that many bald people are bald naturally.
I think they shave their heads, cause it looks cool or something.
The only problem is...there is nothing to catch their sweat....
So it just rolls down their face and onto the floor...
Okay, now I am stretching...I put my butt to the wall, so I ain't waving it in the air and saying howdy to people as they pass by...
Chick plops on to the mat next to mine...starts to stretch by putting her foot on my mat.
I just lay down and pretend she isn't there. She moves her foot.
Second set...still hurts....
Then I realize that I am only 70 situps away from 200.
There is some guy two mats down doing some sort of pike position sit up...looks like it hurts.
So I do 25, 10 and 10
I start doing my lower ab crunches....I am really pushing, cause it really hurts.
I see this girl all the way down staring at me...probably because every time I come up the mat is scooting back, but I am not stopping now.....
and....over 200...201 (one more to show my psyche who is boss).
I did it..over 200..not because I felt like it, but because I WILLED IT.
Haaaa take that negative voice in my head...(Or lazy voice)

Next  thing is to get them done in under 5 minutes....one of my perfect 10 goals.
You see, It's all in the head.
I could have said " I don't feel like doing it..."
Then got up and left.
And felt crappy later, because I let myself down.
But I didn't..
When you are in the middle of a moment like that, it's a good time to remind yourself WHY you are doing this.
What you are getting in return for the effort expended.
I am happy with how far I've come, but I know from experience that contentment can lead to complacency.
And I have no intention of becoming complacent.
It's not how I roll.
So talk to yourself...reason with yourself.
Just don't start doing it out loud or people will look at you funny.
lol,
Hugs,
Chris

Hell month...Day 3 Sweet potatoes and roses

Howdy all,
Hope every one is having a fantabulous day.
I had an okay one...I feel edgy and don't know why.
Tom's on vacay, I got my two mile walk in and my calories are in under 1400.
Who knows.
I had a hamburger without the bun, and a sweet potato tonight.
I love sweet potatoes.
I didn't used to, but now I do.
You know my grumpies might be because I have cut down to one cup of coffee.
It's going to take some getting used to on my part.
so anyways...
We had our Girl Scout meeting tonight and We made flower mats with clear contact paper and roses...
and tulips.
We dismembered the flowers and used the petals to make place mats...the kids really liked it.
They each ended up making two mats each and a bookmark.
Very cute.
Tomorrow it's back to the gym and onto arnold for a 700 calorie burn and 175 situps.
I am going to have to move my high calorie day up from Saturday to Friday.
My husband has to work on Saturday so we will be going out on date night on Friday.
Oh well...
It doesn't matter...It might be that much longer till the end of the month..but it is also that much longer till weigh in as well.
It all evens out.
Man, I think I just want this month to go so well that I want to get out there and bury it now, but can't.
So I have to do it day by day...the way God made it.
lol.
Patience has never been my strong suit.
That is why I am always reminding myself that this journey is always day one, year zero...
So I don't race ahead in my own mind, and get impatient.
Speaking of that...I have to
Take a shower
Do laundry
Paint my nails..
Oh, TMI alert...
Guys can depart right now....
gone...
good....
I bought some new chonies....
Thanks to Paula for the new word...
Cute ones...
Not Grandma ones...
I bought a bra that has black lace with a little bow...
very cute..
and some chonies that are black with lace and silver dots.
Chonies I wouldn't be afraid to be in an accident in...lol.
Well,
That is all for now.
Have a great night all,
Hugs,
Chris