Boy, you got a brain full of can't!

Happy New year! Or it soon will be.
I get all my best ideas from facebook lately..
that's where the quote up there came from...
No, it isn't some old witticism from an uncle...or something my Grammy used to say.
It's something that popped into my head while talking to a person I  happen to be related to.
(You can't pick your relatives, can you? can you.....sigh.)
In this case....it's a cousin by marriage.
Here are some examples of his thinking..
I do this because when the thinking is this egregious, I have no problem exposing it.
Here is his excuse as to why he can't get a job.
(keep in mind I have changed NOTHING in either form or content...this is aaaaalll him.)
 " if I get a job n bust my ass for minimum wage well make less money than just having state assiatance"
 "I grew up poor. I'm still growing up poor. N iv realised that your better off having parents with nice jobs than even trying cuz they will just shit on u. Yes fucki.g try. But no matter what. Wothout a fuckton of luck your going to get stonewalled by some greedy capitalstic ass. N I am a hardcore
socialist but I would also love to work for our government but honestly if I worked in public office I would find it un"constitutional" in a personal way to earn more than minimum wage. And trus me I've seen first hand that we are not free to succeed. Yah. 40 years ago we cud. But nowadays its 70% who you know 10% what u can get away with and 20% what you know. That's the formula for true capitalism. Succeeding in perso.al greed no matter what the cost.

Now I do this...not to pick on socialists. (or even his atrocious spelling and grammar)
I do it to make a point.
"We" (he and I) grew up the same way.
My 'father' abandoned us.
 My mom worked crappy minimum wage jobs. 
The difference? 
 My mom believed in hard work and owning your mistakes.
She also never would have allowed this much whine without some cheese.
But I digress.
You see...he considers it greedy to work for  a living, but living off of other people is okay with him. 
My mom had help, had public assistance...but it was necessary, and when she got back on her feet she stopped. She worked all the way through. It's not that he can't work, it's that he WON'T work.

After I finished reading all of his excuses...
That was the phrase that popped into my head.
The title of this blog..
He has a mind full of "cant's"...
He is my daughter's age.
She will be supporting him with her tax dollars.
My daughter who has succeeded...not because we 'know anyone' or because she has been lucky.
She hasn't succeeded because we are unbelievably wealthy.
She has succeeded because:
She has been diligent.
She has worked hard.
She has sacrificed and will continue to do so.
Even my ten year old said..
"Everyone knows you have to work hard to get ahead'..
I said, "How do you know that?"
And Kate says, "You say it ALL the time!"
And I do. 
I believe it.

I took a long hard look at the old me.
I sounded like that once.
I was that mired in "can't"...once.
I was CONVINCED I couldn't. lose. weight.
Nothing could have convinced me otherwise.
It was depressing, and awful.
But the thing is...I never really tried.
I thought I tried...but I was trying to find a magic pill.
and when the magic pill didn't work I would try the quick fix diet.
The idea that it would take a long time, that I would have to sacrifice and change?
That idea never seemed like a very good one.
I was convinced I didn't have what it took.
I didn't want to change me....I wanted life to change.
I wanted food to be calorie free..
I wanted my body to decide to magically shed my fat.
I would dream about being thin, and then wake up fat.
I would be angry and depressed...
and I would talk badly to myself...
I would make excuses to myself..
I would eat bad food and feel worse.
And none of that DID A DAMN THING.

And then luckily, one day POOF?
It wasn't a one day thing..it was a cascade of reality....
I changed one thing..my marriage....by saying out loud what I wanted...
to the person who could actually do something about it...my husband..
It turns out that what  I wanted to change most, I changed about me...
The only person I can control is ME.
Once I got a taste of what it was to change something for the better, to realize that the locus of control is WITHIN ME....
well, that is when the tumblers began to fall into place.
What he doesn't understand, and for a long time what I didn't understand....is that you can't control your father, or your mother, or really anything or anyone around you.
You can't control others...
You control YOU.
You control how you act and react.
I still remember reading this quote:
...Everything can be taken from a man but one thing; the last of the human freedoms—to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way.
That quote is from Viktor Frankl...a holocaust survivor...and someone who would know what it means to choose your attitude in difficult situations.
Whether or not you feel fat today...well, that shouldn't determine whether you eat crap or not.
Whether your husband loves you or doesn't.
Whether your father was a good father, or your mother showed you what hard work was...
This isn't their life, it's yours..and at the end of the day, you are the one who has got to look back on it and live with what you did or didn't accomplish.
And I didn't want fat to define me.
I looked in that mirror and said "OH HELL NO."
And I no longer accepted that being fat was my 'destiny'..any more than being a loser who doesn't work is my cousin's destiny.
Whether you think you can't or you can...your right.
And you can change that brain full of can't into a brain full of "can" like this.
You are who you think you are.
You are worth what you think you are worth..
and you can do what you think you can do.
Here is to 2012.
Chris out.


choices...sometimes we make bad ones....

LOL. I read that the other day on Facebook.
It was a comment written by an old friend from high school.
And boy is it ever true.
I didn't make a bad choice today.
I made good ones.
I have made bad choices in the past..
(obviously..you don't get morbidly obese by consistantly making great food choices, now do you?)
Choices usually build on each other.
Get some good choices under your belt, and you build good choice momentum.
A few bad choices and it's the same thing.
From my recent experience of Good choice making...
Here is the thought process
I am tired and getting gas. (This is tonight folks)
I told the kids I would get them gummies.
I am hungry.
I am in the gas station...
I could just buy a candy bar.
It's only 210 calories (for a hershey's bar)
or 250 for a milky way bar (caramel).
Now..hungry, cranky and tired....
How do I say no to that?
here's how.
Okay, you know it will taste good..let's not bullshit ourselves.
But, they are so small, and you know it won't fill you up.
(see that's number one...once you start where do you stop?)
You eat the candy bar, you aren't full...you've already "blown it" so what is the point...
(BTW...this is fat brain speaking, and it is usually your fat brain giving your ID the go light to pig out...you have not blown it if you have eaten something you shouldn't have, just get right back on program and let it go...)
And knowing my defective brain...it's burgers, fries and popcorn from there..
So, best not to start..
so, hows about something sweet that is kinda junky, but more filling...like sweetened almonds...
HOLY CRAPSTICKS...300 calories!
No way...
I don't like almonds that much.
okay, how about something sweet with no calories...coke zero it is. lol.
look at that...got something sweet with no calorie payment.
okay...still hungry.
You know you have fish at home...( I say in my brain)
You said you would make it and some grilled zucchini...so why are you hovering over the candy aisle when you know it won't fill you up, it will set off a binge and you will feel shitty about blowing your workout today for something that took 3 minutes to eat?
I didn't..
And when I got in that car and went home without all that.
I felt like a winner.
But you have to get out of whatever situation you are in with your eating integrity intact.
so just start thinking.
Don't turn off your brain.
Whatever you do, don't say
'OH, it won't matter...it's just one ____________"
day...meal...candy bar....
It does matter.
Each day matters...
If I  burn 500 calories a day for two or three days...
say I have a 1500 calorie deficit..
and then I blow 1000 in a big old binge, and I do this every three days or so...
that ends up being around a 1000 calorie a week deficit..
or a one pound a month weight loss.
And really..who wouldn't get discourage with that..
If I didn't do that and I do 500 calories a day for 6 days out of the week with a caloric wash one day...That's almost 3.5 lbs a month...and in a year it's the difference between losing 12 lbs and losing 41 lbs.
Yes....That's how big a difference it makes.
I Just have to win the next battle...and take them as they come along.
I get hungry, and tired..and discouraged.
I write many times for me...It would be easy to sit down...open bag of doritos and watch bad remakes of  jane austen movies.....
But I have to remind myself of what I want...
sometimes I have to do it daily..
sometimes HOURLY.
Whatever it takes.
I can do this.
We can do this.
Chris out.


Are you ready?

I read something on facebook today..
about how hard it is to lose weight.
How hard it is to keep it off.
How this percent of people and that percent of people.
They said a small percent of people take the weight off and keep it off.
You know why?
Because you have to want it.
Not kind of want it...
You have to want it more...
Want it more than you want a chicken nugget.
Want it more than you want ice cream.
Want it more than you want to sit on the couch wasting your life watching other people live theirs on the idiot box.

Want it more than the discomfort you feel when exercising.
Want it more than the ease of the familiar.
Want it more than you want to make excuses about why you can't.
Want it more than you want that reason why they left.
Want it more than thwarting other's expectations.
Want it more than you want your own lowered expectations.
Because when you want it more than all these things, you will succeed....
There is nothing better than living up to your full potential.

So you have to ask yourself:
Are you ready?

No more excuses.
Chris out.


working out at home...

Did that yesterday and today...
Yesterday, I did 10 minute solution off netflix and about 20 minutes of a walk away the pounds cd...today I did my full body workout courtesy of my online trainer omar.
I have decided to cap my calories at 1500...they have been at 1600-1700 for nearly the duration of my weight loss efforts.  But I decided starting January 1rst, that I would be going hard core..and to me, 1500 is hard core. Especially when I am going full bore on my exercise...so I have been eating around 1450 for two days now...and exercising a little lighter than usual trying to shrink my stomach.
Shrink my stomach.
I don't even know if that is scientific. lol.
It's something my mom used to say..
But I have been a case study in how the stomach 'shrinks'.
I can't pig out anywhere near what I used to.
I can only finish half my plate at restaurants...
eating at holidays is stymied.
You name it..
eat less for a prolonged period of time, and you get used to eating less.
Which is what I am doing and what I am focused on...
dinner tonight...
Bean soup.
On my other blog (Yes, I have one...one that I haven't written on since march. lol)
I wrote about some of the meals I plan to make and eat...
But, where ever you see a starch, just dump it..
lol. It's meat and veggies for dinner for me..
so instead of potatoes, I'll eat green  beans or asparagus.
I save my starches for breakfast and lunch.
Well, that's all for now.
Hope you all had a fantastic holiday.
I did.
Chris out.


Merry Christmas...and a mini blog vacation...

Hello all,
I just wanted to say that I am taking off till the 26th.
I am going to focus on really enjoying this time with my family and This Christmas season...
So, I will leave you with a few things I have been thinking of for the past few days and then sign off with my all time favorite Christmas Carol...
1.) Whenever you fail, and you start to talk badly to yourself...
stop and ask your self, what would I think if I heard someone saying this stuff to their kid in the parking lot of a walmart.  If it is so egregious that you would confront the  parent, perhaps you shouldn't be saying it to yourself to begin with...perhaps you should say "well, that wasn't such a good choice...but you have made good choices in the past...so you start again right now." 
Never continue to talk in a negative fashion about yourself.
IT isn't motivating..
It's demotivating and depressing and it will drag  you down.

2.) I know a lot of people are hurting financially.
A few years ago our family was in a real financial bind as my husband departed the military and I was full of anxiety and couldn't seem to catch the Christmas spirit.  That is when I went looking at lights with my kids and some religious music. Jesus came into this world in a barn. But what was most important was that his family stayed together even as they  became 'homeless'...They had each other.
That year reminded me of how important spending time with my kids and my husband was...we may not have had money...but at least he wasn't spending another year in a war zone. Better than even trade, in my book...on that note...I am so glad our soldiers are home from Iraq. God bless them and their families..and God bless all of you.
Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah and anything else you may be celebrating.

God Bless,
Chris out.


Metabolic BURN

Are You Getting Full Metabolic Effects?
“There are four reliable ways to stimulate the maximum caloric burn both during and after the exercise session,” says Teta. “We call these the ‘Bs’ and the ‘Hs’, breathless, burning, heavy and heat. Each workout should work to generate all four of these components.”
In other words, when you finish your circuit you should be wobbly, sweating, striving to catch your breath, and clawing for your water bottle. Your muscles should be fatigued, and if you’re just starting out, you can probably expect a few days of soreness.
CLIPPED AND QUOTED from a fitness website.
Guys, You know I have been working out forever.
I thought I worked out hard.
I was wrong.
If you get the opportunity, do circuits. 
I can't even tell you the difference it's made in such a short amount of time.
A ton.
I can FEEL muscles developing in my legs and in my rear.
Heck....I even have an 'in curve' above my rear end...something I have never had before..
I have always had 'flat butt' syndrome.
 Here is a good example...

It makes my hour long elliptical workouts look like pansy stuff.
My elliptical days  are now my 'easy' days.
So...If you are dead bored by your current workouts...try incorporating circuits.
They are fun and will really push you like you wouldn't believe.
Chris out.


Three years and closing in on the end of the road. (pics)

The End of my weight loss road is May 18th, 2012.
That is the day maintenance begins for me...
That is the Day I will step on the same scale I stepped on three years ago and I will post the number.
And that is the number I will Hold.

I was looking through old photos last night.
I saw the me of nearly two and a half years ago...
And for the life of me, I don't know that person.
I look at old diary entries.
I remember feeling helpless to change.
I remember wishing and hoping to be healthy and thinner..
But if I am being perfectly honest...
Just thinner.
But what I thought day to day.
I don't remember.
I do remember looking  up, seeing what was facing me in the mirror...
and waking up...mentally.
And saying "no more".
That's it.
It's like I decided to live...
And I have decided to put here tonight, in pictures...
the progression over the last few years.
And I will put one more picture up here On May 18th.
And every year after on May 18th.
It's my commitment to me.
Here goes:
What I saw.

 I didn't take a lot of pictures other than that top one at first....wish I had.


 Size 16 170's

I climbed mental hurdles and attended self defense classes:

Then the picture below...taken by my good friend Amber
When I hit 100 lbs lost:
One of the best days of my life:


I took a trip home to see my mom...who was proud of my accomplishment...
And I took a picture with my girls...It was the first time I wasn't trying to hide in a family photo:

I bought my first 'sexy' dress in a very long time:
Size 10

Then there was the day I Fit in my daughter's size 8's

And Got to 146.5 lbs
Where I stalled:

Now I am ready to finish it:
On May 18th, 2012 I will weigh in and post my final picture.
My mind is set and nothing is going to sway it...
I haven't felt this certain since the very beginning.
I deserve this.
So do you, so get on it.
To the finish.
Chris out.


Why I have 'food rules"....

Hey all,
Just got back from the gym and my full body workout.
It was the same one that kept me from walking straight for three days the last time I did it.
This time I not only did it, but was able to walk a mile afterward.

single leg squats 10 reps each side
no rest
bent over row with barbell
12 reps
no rest
romanian deadlift with same barbell
12 sets
no rest
bench press
15 reps
no rest
swiss ball crunch
15-20 reps
90 second rest
then redo all of the above 2 more times..

Next set
reverse lunge
10 times each leg
no rest
bentover row (again!)
10 reps
no rest
forward lunge with one arm extended
10 per side
no rest
bench leg raise
10 reps
90 second rest repeat 2 more times

3rd set
sumo squat with dumb bell
12 reps
no rest
French press (triceps)
12 reps
no rest
barbell curl
12 reps
no rest
Mountain climber
(30 total)
I did this and at the end I only had to pause once on those mountain climbers.
I could FEEL the difference in my legs.
I have gained some major muscle in my legs in a very short period.
If you are looking to shake up your workout routine, these are awesome and require minimal equipment.
I would also reccomend foam rollers.
They hurt but man, do they work.
It shoves the lactic acid out of your muscles and helps you recover quickly.

So Food rules.
When I am eating clean
1.) No sugar...none.
I will eat 2 T of honey on my yogurt, but no white sugar
2.)No white flour.
3.) No drive thrus.
None...there is nothing there they can make better (read healthier) or cheaper than I can make it at home.
it's just garbage. If you want a salad, make one..you will know what is in it.
5.) No late night runs to the 7-11.
IF you don't go, you can't buy a bag of chips, can you?
6.)NO POPCORN...Popcorn is my kryptonite.
7.) And carbs  such as bread or honey or fruit, I eat in the morning.
carbs like veggies (only veggies lol...) I eat after 3.
8.) I eat a big @ss dinner.
Because it is my most vulnerable time. I get hungry and i cave easier in the evening. It's all about knowing yourself.
9.) I try to incorporate fat with my protein to feel full longer.
If I have an omelette...I have it with an ounce of cheese. Feta works for me. Then I have at least 1 cup of veggies with my food. Could be tomato...this morning is was zucchinni.
That's about all.
what my food rules do is this.
I am hungry...or maybe I am NOT HUNGRY.
I am bored.
I want to eat something.
How do you ascertain if you are really  hungry?
Well, first you say No sugar, no white carbs.
but I can have radishes.
Do you want them?
(my go to veggie is cabbage).
If it's a yes...then go for it.
IT's never radishes if it's a craving.
and since the rule is in place during my clean eating days.
I just say 'nope'. Can't have it.
It's a rule.
I don't know why, it just works.
Don't leave fudge room.
It will bite you in the rear.
Have a great night guys.
Chris out.


Lean cuisine....sucks.

Hey all.
I was talking to my mom today and somehow we got on the subject of weight loss.
And I started talking about how I was glad I did..
How weighing less feels better (obviously)
and I look younger...and all that.
well anyways..I started to rant about previous failed attempts.
You know..
the starve and binge.
The lo carb debacle.
You name it.
But by far, my biggest pet peeve is lean cuisine meals.
They suck.
The portions are miniscule.
They contain additives and they just don't fill you up.
I will be standing in the frozen foods section watching an obese lady loading up on these monstrosities and the low fat cookies with incredible amounts of sugar and just be twitching.

You can take your hand and cover that plate...
who would that fill up?
Not me.
It is 250 calories...and has 26 percent of your daily sodium and 9 grams of fat.
nasty...and it is 8 ounces altogether..
basically a cup of food.

Calories there...maybe one hundred.
Add a 6 ounce chicken breast and you have a grand total of 300 calories. 
And do you think that would fill you up? 
Add some balsamic vinagrette to that puppy and you have one heckuva meal if not two.

You have a 300 pound woman who was eating around 3000 calories a day.
She goes from that to 1200 calores.
She is eating these crappy lean cuisine meals.
Then throw in a diet cookie or two and spike your blood sugar and BAM.
cravings, hunger and despair.
INstead of say going to 1800 and taking a walk.
so there she is, starving.
eating food that tastes like the underside of the seat of a 1960 nova.
and not doing anything proactive.
Not changing thought patterns.
Surrounded by temptation.
 WAtching as her body slows it's rate of loss while she is still hungry because your body's metabolism adjusts..
and by cutting your calories so low you have given yourself no where to go.
And just waiting for your body to change.
When change will be a long time coming.
No wonder people fail..and fail in spectacular fashion.
Eat real food.
I wish they would teach that.
Eat real food and do not starve.
Do not eat crap..
processed crap.
And do something to make yourself feel progress..
Give yourself physical goals.
Allow yourself a treat and stop calling yourself names.
And don't expect the weight off by a certain date.
That's all, I feel better now. lol.


passion or perfection?

I think passion wins.

OR as Tim Tebow says:
"Hard work beats talent, when talent doesn't work as hard."

You don't need to be perfect to lose weight.
Only downing fish capsules and wheat grass.
Or have perfect form.
I don't need to be perfectly pretty:
To get the guy.
Or a perfect Passer:
To win the game.
Or the Perfect person:
To live your life.
What inspires people?
That inspires.
I went through a period of NOT being inspired.
My weight loss slowed, and stopped...
Heck I even gained a few pounds.
Because I forgot what gave me the passion to lose the weight.
My passion wasn't to have a perfect ass.
It was to LIVE.
Like I was meant to.
To give life my all and not let it pass me by in some kind of slow motion suicide by time.
Death by clock..
Death by donut.
My greatest achievement being the ability to down 3000 calories in a sitting.
My weight is a number.
My life is what counts.

Some quick quotes:
With out passion you don't have energy, with out energy you have nothing.
Donald Trump
Fear is the passion of slaves. Patrick Henry (wow that one was good!)

Great dancers are not great because of their technique, they are great because of their passion.
Martha graham

My belief is that what comes across on the television is a capture of my enthusiasm and my passion for wildlife. Steve Irwin

The music itself could never take the place of my own passion in life.

Without passion man is a mere latent force and possibility, like the flint which awaits the shock of the iron before it can give forth its spark.
Henri frederic amiel
Don't be a possibility...be the flame.
Chris out.


Standards....Getting some....

I don't know about you all..But I have standards in certain areas of my life.
There are things I feel are very important.
When it comes to my kids, my standard was and is very high.
what I want them to learn etc.
When it came to my weight my standard was...
well, I didn't have one.
I didn't have a standard for personal appearance other than clean and covered and combed.
I thought it was too shallow.
It's funny how we have standards about some things and not about others.
For some,
Cussing is a big fat no no...
For others, not so much.
I'll never forget it...I was with this women...the kids were all over the place...yelling, rebellious and crawling on the floor...and nothing.
Not a flinch.
Someone had taken a bag of garbage that was tied...and put it in the car..
She was p*ssed.
That was 'disgusting'.
The rest...not disgusting.
I would have been much more upset at the blatant disrespect the kids showed the place they were in, and the people who were there.
It threw me.
Then I realized, we are all different.
But I was watching a young man the other day...and I really admired his take on 'standards'.
This young man is Tim Tebow.
He knows what he is trying to accomplish.
He had personal standards that weren't just about how he looked...but what life meant.
He had a reason for exercising and for working hard, above and beyond the superficial.
And it made me realize why standards are so important.
Because they teach your children what is and isn't acceptable.
And the lower your standards are...the lower theirs will be.
You see, my standard for my oldest daughter is A's and B's in school..
I know she can do it..
(and really its B's in math and A's in every thing else...because it is her toughest subject and she TRIES.)
My mom's was c's and graduate.
I lived up to her expectations.
Kate lives up to both hers and mine.
Kids set the bar by the parent's standard.
YOu tell your kids to 'not get caught'...they see no reason to be honest.

I never thought to set a bar on my personal appearance.
But you will notice thin women have a bar...
It could be a five pound bar...or a 10 pound bar.
It's the trigger that says..
'OH NO'....I am not going to be "insert number here'.
And it triggers a response..
usually weight loss or what have you.
It triggers movement.
With my weight, I just kept saying...
'Oh, I'm not that bad"
Which isn't a standard, it's an excuse or a way to put off dealing with the weight issue.
Or my house...
There should be a minimum standard.
Well, It's not bad...
But something like
I don't leave dishes in the sink before bed etc.
I vaccuum the floor once a day etc.
And for personal fitness it could be..
I eat clean 6 days out of 7.
I exercise minimum 1 hour a day 6 days a week.
It's a standard..
and here is the video that set all this thinking off..

That this young man gets it at such a young age is a testament to his parents. Period.
I have been watching him and thinking...that is how you become a role model.
Live your convictions out loud and set your standards for your life HIGH.
You prove yourself through your actions.
Those are my thoughts.
I did HIIT training yesterday and today I did my third whole body workout.
My eating is good.
But I have dishes that need doing.
Have a great night guys!
Chris out.


N.E.P.A (Non exercise physical activity) and weight loss....

Also known as a good way to burn extra calories outside the gym.
The majority of our time is not spent inside the gym...or it shouldn't be, right?! lol.
So, Omar says move around...stand up when talking on the phone or doing bills or whatever it is you are doing.
I know, I am quoting omar.
Because I buy what he's selling.
In other words, he doesn't bs.
Alot of programs are selling bullshit.
Take this pill..
you will lose x amount of pounds
If you lose TOO MANY pounds...call a doctor.
As if it's ever actually been a problem.
When I see this crap on tv or hear it on the radio...I give it a mental middle finger.
Lose 20 lbs in 2 weeks.
Lose 30 pounds before the new year.
Lose your mind and buy this shit.
Don't buy it.
Sean Anderson has a book...called transformation road.
Look it up...he lost around 250 pounds.
He started at 505 pounds.
You know how he lost it.
wait for it...
He ate less and worked out more.
I buy what he's selling.
Because it's real.
There is no magic.
Just consistency.
I have lost over 100 lbs so far.
How did I do it?
I ate less...and exercised more.
Now, there are things that will make weight loss 'easier'.
Get rid of sugar.
It will reduce cravings.
Get rid of white flour..
same thing...it reduces cravings.
white rice, white flour, white sugar...they pack a big calorie punch...little nutritional value, and if you give them up...you will feel better.
Replace them with fruits and vegetables and some whole grains.
You'll get to eat more and feel fuller.
Now for nepa...it doesn't replace your workout.
But after  you workout, park in the north 40 and trek in at walmart..
stand while you talk on the phone.
try to get in 10,000 steps by getting a pedometer and paying attention.
And don't eat all the calories you just busted your ass getting rid of in the gym.
Do that, and you will lose weight.
That's all.
Chris out.


TAking off the mask...

I was talking to my kids tonight about making friends.
My oldest gives a rat's rear what people think...
My youngest cares too much.
So we were talking about finding  a middle ground.
I will admit that I have no good advice to give.
I don't understand why people have such a problem simply being kind.
IT isn't that hard.
I have never understand this compulsion some people have to make sure that the people they associate with mirror their image, so to speak.
For instance...in my oldest daughter's freshmen year of high school, she inadvertantly stumbled into the popular crowd...she was invited to sit with them..
By the end of week one..they had given her a list of things she needed to change to be accepted.
Hair, speech, clothing...
My daughter read it and ripped it up.
They didn't sit with her anymore.
She made new friends.
What she noticed was, all those people who tried to change her, they were unhappy with themselves.
Quite frankly, I wonder how many people are unhappy with themselves.
Seeing the level of backbiting, anger and mistreatment there is in the world makes one wonder.
The happier I am with myself, the more other's unhappiness seems to stand in glaring contrast.
It's bizarre.
I want people to treat my kids well.
other kids etc.
But that may be asking too much when they can't seem to treat themselves well.
My oldest daughter said "I don't bother with a mask...I just call people on their bs now'.
It sounds like a good plan to me.
Be as honest, and straightforward as  you can.
The soul suckers will scatter.
Have a great night guys.
Chris out.


Avoiding weight loss burn out....

hey all...
Back from my day, such as it was...
which simply included a ton of running around getting not a lot accomplished.
Done with that.
I did buy 50 lbs of potatoes for 10 dollars from a nice old hispanic man on the side of the road.
Keeping it local.

I was listening to christian radio the other day.
And was cleaning..
kind of half in and half out with the listening..
When something the preacher said made me say WHAT!
Luckily he repeated that..
he said
"I repeat, It isn't striving with passion toward your goal that burns you out...it's striving towards a goal you feel is UNATTAINABLE that burns you out."
(Don't you love it when that happens..you miss it and God knows it's important so he has the dude repeat it?!)
When did I run into my big old mucking around?
Really last july when I went back to michigan...
and then kept trying and trying.
When I got down to 145 and felt phhhhtttt.
what's the difference between 135 and 145.
It's never going to make my body 20 years old and perky.
and just like that BLAMMO.
Motivation kinked.
And it's true.
My body will never be a 20 year old body.
The time for that has passed.
But, I can be healthy.
I can win.
Over every bad thing that happened to me.
Over every fear.
Every mean comment.
Every moment when I thought they might be right..
That I will never again be as thin as I was when I was 19..
That isn't true.
I will be and I will be healthier..
It may not look the same.
It may all be a little further south.
That's okay.
Because my motivation isn't to be 20.
It's to be whole.
So figure out what your motivation is...
And make sure that it isn't unattainable...through weight loss.
Weight loss will not make you happy.
Get you the perfect boyfriend.
Make you rich.
Take care of your relationship issues.
IT will give you a sense of accomplishment.
It will give you a sense of health.
IT will give you a better quality of life.
To avoid workout and weight loss burnout...set your goals and make them attainable and relevant.
Chris out.
P.S.  I am starting a little something I'll call "Letters to Omar'

Omar is my psuedo coach and the crazy booger who designed those workout programs I am using.
The omar who wants me to drink ALMOND MILK...
Almond milk isn't actually possible.
Almond being a nut and milk being something extracted from mammals.
And it took two stores to find it.
My letter to omar tonight...
Dear Omar:
If I can't find almond milk, Can I use butter milk? .

Have a great night guys.


Full Body workout number 2...better.

I cut those full body workouts by 1/3rd.
After that last full body workout I couldn't even walk the next few days.
Now, I am sore but am able to go to the gym tomorrow.
Sore is just another word for 'working'.
I will go grocery shopping tomorrow.
It is a biggie because I need a few things I don't normally get..
like iodized sea salt.
I just wanted everyone to know that I read your comments.
I always read the comments.
I don't always get time to comment on the comments because I don't always have access to t he computer.
But I do appreciate them and the people who read here.
The next few months should be very productive.
I hope you all had a great night.
I did.
Hang in there and keep plugging.
I will too.
Chris out.