cashier chronicles...aka the devolution of humanity

manager mania: 
The further adventures of your dollar tree manager...
Time: The last two days
Place: The Dollar tree

the story of mushmouth, titty sling and a popped tart. Okay...the last two days have been cah-razy. First I have decided that I do not have an option...I need to clean for about 20 minutes after the store closes, or the store will not be clean...number 2, I have decided that people are nuts. Number three, my faith in humanity is daily simultaneously sunk to new lows and lifted to new heights...because there are three kinds of people in life...the evolving, the devolving and the insane.

First up...mushmouth. 
Guy comes up to me....and mutters yahmddahab griluntack. (?)
"Excuse me sir?"
'Yah habbin tahab grillin tack.' (...was that grilling in there?)
"I'm sorry sir, could you repeat that...it's loud in here.."
(honest thought from your dollar tree manager...speak UP and ARTICULATE @SSHOLE)
"Ya habbin da grillun taco." (having...grilling...taco)
Do we have GRILLING TACOS sir?
yeb. (assumes that means yes)
No sir...we have no grilling tacos
(wtf is a grilling taco.!)

tanku (thank you)
Your welcome sir.

the evolver ( people who are moving forward in our dear evolutionary process...aka..people I can talk to and admire..)
a lady with multiple sclerosis who refuses to use a wheel chair, because she is going to use her body while she can...and tells her sons daily that they can do anything...I met her while she was searching for coconut.
She says..."I take away people's excuses'...

little does she know how many excuses people have.

on to titty sling.
lady comes in last night at the last minute...it's nine o clock..
but Paris Hilton thinks this is her personal shopping hour at the dollar tree...she is shuffling around the store, picking up her items...yelling at her children...she shuffles on up...takes shit out of the cart at 9:15...15 minutes after we are closed...tells us she doesn't want several items (which we will now have to put back) she is wearing a tank top and no bra...so we are all treated to her boobs (which hang down to her navel...that are covered only the last twenty percent...thank God for small mercies) near the bottom...so we see the sack like appendages..suspended from her chest in what I dubbed, in that moment, a titty sling. 
She was rude, uncouth and finally she left...

and finally
devolving.
last, but certainly not least....Mrs. pop tart.
tonight..near the end of the shift..mrs. pop tart wanted to trade in a hard line item for a food item.
We can't do that..because food doesn't have tax...so we would owe her money.
Dollar tree policy specifically states no monetary refunds.
J tells her no..she actually has me called to the front..wherein j asks me the policy..I repeat the policy..
She says, 'You don't have to have an attitude.'
I said, "I'm not having an attitude ma'am, I am just stating the policy'...
then she proceeds to tell me that he (J) can take the 'extra' money from his till and just keep it..and I tell her that THAT would get me written up, and him fired.
she then demands the number for corporate...
yes,
that's right folks...
she wants the number for corporate....for her pop tarts return.
I said 'yes ma'am'.
and handed her the number.
I think the only people on earth who could think less of most humans than dollar tree employees...
must be the corporate complaint line.
That is all for tonight folks.

How to get a bikini body...

I am linking here.....this is how you get a bikini body.
As a person striving to get healthy.....I am not getting healthy to prove I am worth while...I am getting healthy for me..

Whatever you do....do it for you.
period.

Who has the power?

You have the power.

Have you ever been driving down the road and looked at the center line..and though for a moment about the fact that the only thing keeping the other car on their side of the road (apart from a healthy sense of self preservation) are societal norms and a bit of paint?

The only thing keeping you from their side is the same?

One flick of your hand..and the lives of at least two people are changed forever.

You could change your whole life in one hour.

YOu could go home...pack up and leave.
you could ask for a divorce..call everyone you know and tell them you are done.
Quit your job.
Jump off a bridge.
stand naked in the town square.

The only thing that stops us from doing things...is our own mind.
Our conscience.
Our norms.
Today I did something I don't normally do.
I unfriended someone on facebook..
I did it because I realized that I no longer want people in my life,
who are nothing but a simmering ball of hate..
to fill my life with their invective.
who pollute my soul with their ignorance..
I don't care.
In one moment, I said no more.

Now with some things...it is harder.
and you may have to pay a bigger price.
to have the life you truly want...
It's worth it.
You have the power.
You just have to DECIDE.

once you decide, you move forward...
and it will probably be painful..
but paying short term
beats the hell out of long term regret.
There can be nothing sadder than looking back on a life you wasted.
 wasted trying to be a person you didn't like very much..
doing things you can't stand
for people who don't really give a shit...
in a life they don't have to live.

People always have opinions about the lives of others.
Yet, they don't have to live it.
You do.
When you come to die...no one will be looking back for you...rationalizing your decisions.
It will just be you.
And I think about this quite often.
The clarity on the day of your death..
I am betting and guessing..
is amazing.
20/20
a clear view to the horizon.
The only things we will regret will be not living fully and not loving enough.

It is not going to be the number on the scale.
although getting healthy to enjoy life is important.
IT's not going to be the bank account...
although being frugal and saving matter...

I want to look back and see that I took whatever power I had and leveraged it into a life that was full and fantastic.
I will not hand my power to anyone.
I will not abdicate my possibilities.
With love,
Chris