8.11.2015

The essence of achieving lasting change

The essence of change is knowing yourself where you are, envisioning who you want to become..and then charting a course between these two points.

Weight loss gurus tell you it looks like this..

.--------------"eat less"-----------------------"move more"---------------"goal weight".

Problem solved.

N.....o......t........t.....r......u......e

I've said before that morbid obesity is usually a symptom of a larger problem.
It can be a shield.
An excuse.
A reason.
A validation.

Your reason to lose the weight has to be bigger than your reason to keep it.
The problem is...
You may not know what the reason for your misuse of food IS, until you begin to lose the weight.
Or how BIG the reason is...
So your wanting to lose the weight has got to be bigger than wanting to look good in a pair of jeans..
For many morbidly obese people..
It isn't even something they can imagine...
Your reason for weight loss is ultimately going to be life altering.
And no one prepares you..
No one.
It is exhilarating.
And frightening..
For me..I couldn't see past two hundred pounds..
I got down to 148 and stalled because I didn't have a reason to continue.i also had overwhelming fear...
My real reason I was fat.
I was afraid of attention from men..
Not a little afraid..
Phobic afraid.
Then life intervened.
I got a job blah blah blah...
Whatever. 
Now I have my reason to lose the rest of the weight..and it involved nothing less than finding my life's purpose.
Like a graphic I once saw...your weight loss journey..if it's real change, will not happen in a six month burst of juicing glory..
Or cabbage soup.
Or pills...
It is a long, hard road of learning to use food in its proper context. Learning to cope with emotions...deal with trauma...find your joy and embrace the change.
And that's just the weight loss...
I write this not to discourage anyone..but to encourage someone.
Someone, somewhere...thinks because they've had a setback..it's over.
It's not over...you have learned something essential.
Now move forward.
The essence of change is a continuous process of learning, applying and growing.  
But you have to begin.
So begin.




4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Good grief. I think that is a picture of Cecil the rare black maned lion killed in Zimbabwe by the dentist. He didn't win this last one.

Otherwise, good post. :}

As I read thru, it crossed my mind that obesity is sometimes the result of solving a problem the wrong way. And I no sooner gathered my thoughts about that when you rounded out your post with just that very thought.

For many of us, eating is done to soothe anxiety...the result is fat. The desire isn't to hide or whatever, the fat is the unwanted result of eating to medicate. Sigh.

I, of course, speak from personal experience. This week's experience to be exact. Couldn't figure out why I had these almost uncontrollable 'need to feed' munchies. Eventually, I realized that it was anxiety r/t the blood work I had today and a medical thing coming up on Wednesday. yes. Eating helps that. sigh.

I need to get that Xanax scrip refilled. (Only half-way kidding.)

Deb

Darcy Winters said...

Great post! I'm not sure if that is Cecil or not. Cecil had a broad nose and bigger face (I think???). Anywhoo, you are so right about the weight being because of a bigger reason. It is terribly hard, however, to figure out just exactly what that reason is. Still searching here.

Cole Walter Mellon said...

I've recently gotten serious about this weight loss business again, so this post really hit home with me. QUIT HITTING MY HOME, CHRISTINE! Oh nevermind... keep hitting the home. We all need it.

Robin said...

I love this (like everything you write). I'm in the process of trying to figure out how I can create a path to good healthy without giving up every other aspect of my life. My mom seems convinced it is possible while I remain less certain. I suppose the most likely option is that it does exist, but remains something I've yet to find. And just like getting somewhat better was an extreme improvement (and involved traveling across uncharted territory) getting to lasting improvement will require more of the same (in different uncharted territory). As the lion says, "There is only winning and learning."