Anyone else have problems in this sphere...you know, for the longest time I thought my problem was my mouth.
out of the abundance of the heart...the mouth speaks.
I have an impatient spirit.
It wasn't until I learned patience in dieting that I was able to lose weight.
before this last go round I would try any fad diet that would come along....
I wanted to get the weight off FAST.
When it didn't, I would go off my diet and eat everything in sight out of frustration.
This last go round the first thought that popped in my head was:
I don't care if it takes a hundred years. It's coming off.
Slowly, but surely it did.
Now I am in maintenance of 145 lbs...even though it is not my goal weight.
You know why.
If I can't maintain 145, what makes me think I can get to 135?
Then I may, but regain...
You see, in the end...while it's nice to be a lower number...the number isn't what it's all about.
I have finally hit upon what my problem is with the last 10 pounds.
I don't want my life to be about my body and how it looks in a pair of jeans.
I just don't care that much.
I care about my health in so much as this...that I can live my life without impediments and that I am healthy and able to enjoy life.
So I felt a sense of anxiety.
Exercise and healthy eating had been the center of my universe for two years.
I knew they couldn't be forever, if I were to make that the center of my universe, I would be living a shallow existence.
...but I simply couldn't find a good balance.
I had a lot of thinking to do.
I ate too much...again..trying to fill the hole that way...which lead to a five pound gain.
I stopped doing that...today was a really good day.
It doesn't work...
making exercise my God didn't work..
making intellect My God didn't work.
For years I made my children my center, my focus.
luckily I was never into drugs, or money...but for some that can be a kind of God.
I have to make God my center...
but for the last week I have been struggling...
What is my PURPOSE!
I know, I need to raise my kids, keep my house etc.
I have those under control.
What is the bigger picture...
I think deep inside we have a need to serve.
I have felt this pressing on me more and more over the last few months.
Yes I need to grow spiritually...but to what purpose?
To shout into a vacuum?
To serve others...
To be some sort of intellectual or spiritual giant and never share...It's useless.
To have a sound mind and a healthy body but to do nothing with them?
I have been putting off joining my church because my husband and oldest daughter don't go.
Well, I am not doing that any longer.
If they don't want to go that's fine...
But I am choosing to belong and to serve...
As such here is my life statement I wrote last week...
It took me a few years to write this...
My life statement.
I am a child Of God. His instrument.
As such I will live my life first and foremost to glorify him.
I will live honestly and will model integrity.
I will speak and act with kindness,
always seeking first to understand rather than judge.
I will help when and where I can.
I will take only when I have no other option.
I will seek to leave each person and situation better than how I found them.
I will live life to it's fullest, not fearing death but embracing each day as a gift.
I will make plans from hope, not fear.
I will commit myself daily to my home, my family and my community.
I will be diligent and responsible with the resources God has given me.
I will run my race and strive to die to myself daily and do everything with excellence to show the world the power of God's grace.
Will I hit this 100 percent...no...but if you have no target...how can you hit your goal?
Rome wasn't built in a day.