Lead, follow, or get out of the way...I choose lead.

Hey all,
First let's start with my workout..it was epic.
I did one hour at my self defense class..then I went to the gym and did a whole body workout with brooke, and a mile walk.
It was a two and a half hour workout.
I ate 1750 calories...These last two weeks have been on point with the eating and exercise.

My day was incredibly busy.
My last two weeks have been very busy.
In the midst of all of this hullabaloo, I have reached a few conclusions.
Don't wait till you feel a crisis has been reached to better yourself.
I have spent years attempting to better everyone around me..it's what women do.
Now it is time to find out what I can do..what I can contribute..and pour some of that effort into me. 

Number two..
I have given the words and actions of others more power than my own.
Since I have started changing how I approach my husband and everyone around me..
I have noticed a change in response.
By being proactive,  I am creating my responses.
What do I mean.
I mean I am acting, not being acted upon.
When you choose a direction...and begin to put plans in place with confidence..
Most people don't have that kind of determination..or sense of purpose.
They either stand by with a kind of stupefied expression...aka 'get out of the way'..
or they help (aka follow).
I have found that when people are kind of standing around without a purpose, You can give them a purpose (aka lead).
So, I have been delegating.
And by gosh..it works.
My youngest just did the dishes...my oldest vacuumed upstairs and my husband packed his own lunch and got himself around.
Me...I highlighted notes I took today and wrote my to do list for tomorrow.
I went to my 'orientation' meeting at women's resources last Thursday.
It was very interesting..looking around that room..I wondered what had brought everyone there.
No one volunteered any information.
I signed up for two classes..
One is a resume class..and the other is an interviewing class.
Those are in August.
I went to the library and found out I don't have to wait for computer classes.
They have a self guided tutorial  you can use for the Microsoft office suite. 
So Today was my first day using the self tutor.
I am learning outlook.
Next I will be learning Word, then excel.

After I finish my online tutorials for Microsoft....I am going down to the women's resource agency to see if I can't volunteer there one or two days a week in the front office. I hope to gain experience in customer service and working in an office setting.  I think six months of learning computer programs and volunteering will give me enough experience to apply for an entry level secretarial position...from there I can begin earning money to go to college.
Once I get an associates degree in either business or liberal arts (aka social work).
 I can become an administrative assistant. A fancy term for a secretary who makes more money. LOL.
My goal is to work for one of these agencies. Make enough money to slowly put myself through college and become an executive assistant.  That is where the money and career is..So for now, I will  use this time to learn skills and make the contacts that will make that possible.
That is what I have been up to.
Have a great night.
Chris out.


Anonymous said...

You have an amazing ability to set out a long range plan and, more importantly, the patience to walk it out a step at a time.

Beginning by volunteering is wise for a number of reasons. You will not only gain skills, but you will also get the idea whether you 1. would like doing office work on a daily basis and 2. what doing social social work in an agency setting feels like. (Personally, I love working in agencies like the Women's Resource Center.)

A few tidbits occurred to me as I read, that I am--of course--going to share. You may have already considered them, but just in case...

There is grant money out there for women who want to go to school. The Women's Resource Center should know about it or be able to direct you to who does.

If you want to be an administrative assistant, I would think a business school would be the best route. Then, once you get your training there, and land an office job, then you would want to go to college.

Business school courses usually range from 3 months to 2 years, depending on your career goal and program that matches it.

Do know, unless Colorado is different from Pennsylvania, you will make as much, if not more, money as an administrative assistant in a good office as you will in social work...even with a Master's Degree after the bachelors.

If you decide to skip business school and plunge right into a SW degree, tho, make sure the program is an accredited social work program, not a lame sociology degree that markets itself as a pathway to doing social work. You want to graduate with a "BSW" bachelor's degree in social work--not sociology or, heaven forbid, psychology. And an associate's degree in SW is almost useless. (Again, this is PA truth, Colorado may be different.)

So. If your first step is to land a good office job, I advise starting with a business school program that will provide you with the skills to meet your office goal, then college.

Just my two cents--and best wishes.


'Yellow Rose' Jasmine said...

How much do I love it that you have laid out your plans, are charging forward full steam ahead, & letting nothing and no one get in your way?!
You will do well, I have no doubt. You are certainly a leader.

Robin said...

It sounds like you've had some time to process everything that you posted about last time and the comments left.

Yes, I totally agree. Everyone is reacting to this new confident you.

One way to alleviate a fear based response is to lead. Excellent. That is actually a loving response. Eventually, I hope, your husband will reach a place where he stops reacting and understands that this is YOU. He can then step up and be your partner. You can lead together vs. you having to lead him. Until then...

I really like your Action Plan. Your kids are old enough that it is time for you to do things that are best for YOU.

Unknown said...

you are INDEED a leader.
today I be a GIT OUT OF THE WAY'er :0)

Mom to the Fourth Power said...

I love that! Realizing that you have been giving others more power in their words and actions than your own! That is powerful!!

Sometimes the reason we feel hurt over things is just that. We think that someone else's opinion have more value than our own.

And being proactive is the action of valuing yourself and knowing you make a difference. It's self-confidence in action (or faking it till you make it).

I so need to do this right now!! I just feel the energy from this post.



Barbara said...

Just found your blog and I love your attitude.. Take Charge and Get out of my way!. Love it

paulawannacracker said...

Sounds like a great plan Chris. I've been doing "administrative assistant" stuff for years and I am still learning.

Great to catch up on your blog.

E. Jane said...

Sounds like you have a great plan, Chris. And Deb WBF is right about the degree. I went to college at the age of 43, and got the BSW and later a master's. With grants and student loans, it was easier than I thought. I started by taking one course a quarter. That way I got my feet wet. It changed my life and was one of the best things I have done in my life. After the degree, I worked for many years in social work and loved it!

Anonymous said...

You've got a great attitude, love it! It sounds like you have your long range and short range goals in order and I have no doubt your going to achieve them.


Retta said...

I know you must be super busy with the classes and self-guided tutorials. But was thinking about you today. So wanted to say hello, and I hope all is going well for you, and your life is full of anticipation and joy, along with all the hard work.

Putz said...

my blod sugaar is 219 today, any advice to me????

Leslie said...

I am so glad I found your blog, and I love the title. I am too working on living my life more deliberately. I just started my blog, www.weight4baby.com. I am also in a career transition. I got laid off in July. I have laid out my plan too. I can't wait to read more of your blog.


Anonymous said...

Hey, Chris. Been praying for you... I don't know if the floods are troubling you or not.


Anonymous said...

You look fantastic hun. I am loving the articles too. x

Quiltingranny said...

Best wishes on your new goals! I couldn't take the self paced MS classes, to many new things no one at our employment agency could help with and with my neuro issues I need a teacher at times. I did take their classes on resume and interviewing and learned...my resume skills were great, my interviewing needed work. I didn't realize I shook my leg during interviews, paused frequently and lost focus. After a second go around, the teacher loved the changes, they were amazing and you will be amazing!

Robin said...

Hey Chris, tomorrow I will be posting a blog about bloggers I miss reading in this ole blogosphere. Of course you make the list!!! I hope you read the post and it inspires you to rejoin blogging... at least occasionally. I love FB, but it isn't the same thing... at all:(

bbubblyb said...

I miss your words, how are you?