I know, I havent been around in a while...thas because about two weeks into my grand plan...i read want ads. They all WANTED experience.  So i got a job.  As a cashier.  How did I do that?  I had nothing on my resume but dog sitting.  I went down the strip mall  a few miles away.. Business to business and spoke personally to the managers....four in, I found someone who would give me a shot.   I have had this job for  three months now.  My exercise and dieting went no where in that time...so i basically stayed the same...160s.  But you want to know something?  After not havin worked outside the home for 19 years....making a paycheck and feeeling capable was my final puzzle piece to who I am.   Not that I am a cashier, but  that I am an adult capable of earning and learning..my next goal is to be a bank teller.  From there i can move into a full time position.  The biggest change is how i allow myself to be talked to and treated.  I dont feel guilty spending money, because i help earn it..i am nobody's glorified maid..and i havent been yelled at about the house or anything else in five months.  I will discuss that interesting development later on....Last week i stepped up my exercise..today was the first day i have restricted my calories..i havent been to my self defense classes in Two months..but over the last month, I have been redistributing chores to other family members and lightening my own load.  I have so much to talk about...butnot alot of time.  I will be blogging once a week for accountability and to get back in touch with you all..these last five months..i have learned so much about how i got into a precarious position. How, even though I am a strong willed, strong minded women, I had given away all my power because I thought I was making a safe home for my children..and how I took back my power...it feels good.

I feel capable, empowered and whole.

I will share more soon.
Glad to be back.

Calories 1767
2 mile walk

Chris out


Jo said...

Welcome back! It is great to see the positive changes you are making in your life! You are a strong and impressive woman Chris. I know you will succeed at whatever you set your mind to.

downsizers said...

I have been thinking about you and was so glad to see a post from you pop up as I was checking the people whom I follow. It is so important to feel secure and confident and am so glad that this job has helped you find this necessary part of life. It has made you better and it will make others better as well as they give you the respect that you expect and deserve. I am looking forward to reading more from you. Take care.

outdoor.mom said...

congrats on your job :-)

Robin said...

I am so happy to see you blogging again. There are many ways to communicate, but I still feel like this one is the most honest. Other social forums are limiting.

I can't wait to walk through this process with you of self empowerment. You are so inspiring!

Weighing Well said...

I am so happy to read this! I followed my husband to Memphis so he could further his career goals. I left behind my home, my grown children, my grandchildren and parents who are getting old. Here in Memphis I have no idea who I am and am having to redefine me. I totally understand powerless. Soooo happy for you that you took things in hand and made such a huge scary step! I am working on doing the same. You have inspired me!

My name WAS Female, I shit you not! said...


'Yellow Rose' Jasmine said...

Always so good to hear from you. Your writing is very inspiring and your viewpoint is good at making people think about things differently. I love that.
Have certainly thought of you and missed your blogging. I wish you the best with this new part of your journey!