Hello.

Hello.
I know, I havent been around in a while...thas because about two weeks into my grand plan...i read want ads. They all WANTED experience.  So i got a job.  As a cashier.  How did I do that?  I had nothing on my resume but dog sitting.  I went down the strip mall  a few miles away.. Business to business and spoke personally to the managers....four in, I found someone who would give me a shot.   I have had this job for  three months now.  My exercise and dieting went no where in that time...so i basically stayed the same...160s.  But you want to know something?  After not havin worked outside the home for 19 years....making a paycheck and feeeling capable was my final puzzle piece to who I am.   Not that I am a cashier, but  that I am an adult capable of earning and learning..my next goal is to be a bank teller.  From there i can move into a full time position.  The biggest change is how i allow myself to be talked to and treated.  I dont feel guilty spending money, because i help earn it..i am nobody's glorified maid..and i havent been yelled at about the house or anything else in five months.  I will discuss that interesting development later on....Last week i stepped up my exercise..today was the first day i have restricted my calories..i havent been to my self defense classes in Two months..but over the last month, I have been redistributing chores to other family members and lightening my own load.  I have so much to talk about...butnot alot of time.  I will be blogging once a week for accountability and to get back in touch with you all..these last five months..i have learned so much about how i got into a precarious position. How, even though I am a strong willed, strong minded women, I had given away all my power because I thought I was making a safe home for my children..and how I took back my power...it feels good.

I feel capable, empowered and whole.

I will share more soon.
Glad to be back.

Calories 1767
2 mile walk

Chris out