Food didn't get you fat.
Your brain got you fat.
Food can't up and stuff itself in your face..
only you can do that.
or I should say...
only I could do that.
Using food as a means to an end other than sustenance...
that's what got me fat.
And the most amazing thing was how I had convinced myself that I had no control over the issue.
I literally had given up.
I remember vividly, after having an argument with my husband.
Hopping on a treadmill
and one minute in just crying..
I began to weep.
I said "I just can't.'
I was totally defeated...
mind, body and spirit.
At that moment I CHOSE FAILURE.
I didn't realize I was choosing it.
But I was.
Then one day I woke up from my stupor and chose to do a few things.
I didn't bother wondering if I could or couldn't.
I knew a few things.
I knew the food couldn't hop into my face unless I put it in..
But I HAD TO BE CONSISTENT.
And I had to make exercise a part of my life
consistency is a pain in the ass...
The first two years it consumed me..
then I realized I couldn't live like THAT for the rest of my life.
I knew I had to start living life...
I had to learn MODERATION.
moderation is a pain in the ass.
it's a learned skill.
Learning that you need to eat enough...but not too much.
Learning to exercise, but not kill yourself.
Learning to live your life..and have an occasional indulgence..
and not slip back.
Learning to have one cookie.
Learning to compartmentalize your life.
Learning to be happy..
Learning how to express your emotions, but not overwhelm others with them...
Learning that being skinny doesn't make you happy..ONLY YOU CAN DO THAT.
fat is a symptom.
The cure is a lot of work.
But it's doable.
And it's an ongoing project.