5.13.2011

great week....and a very sad sentence....

Hey all,
well...my week went exactly as I would have wished food and exercise wise.
Today is my 2000 calorie day...and I earned everyone of them at the gym...\
all my other calories should add up to a small loss come sunday.
And I am sure you all read my blog about mother's day...
and here is part of the reason why I wrote it...
I have a relative who seems to think staying at home with your kids is not a good 'career'...
Saddest sentence I think I have ever heard...I heard today...
she said "Some women use their children as an excuse to not get a job."
Welcome to the proletariat.
Homemaking used to be considered a job.
Now it's seen as an excuse to avoid the job market.
As I have already said, I think it's one of the most important jobs ever...even if you have no children in the home.
Because you can extend your hospitality to other women, to lonely people...bachelors, neighborhood kids...you could make your home a haven from a lot of people who have no home...just a house.
The fact that my *redacted doesn't understand this is just plain sad.
My mother worked because she needed to...but she still strove to make our house a home...(after the divorce, it  helps to get rid of the abusive types in the house...makes it more comfortable)
I bit my lip.
Hard.
I am a big believer in respecting your elders...even when they are completely cracked.
But what I really wanted to say isn't printable...
So I will just leave you with this...

"Mama's Mama, on a winter's day, milked the cows
and fed them hay; slopped the hogs, saddled
the mule and got the children off to school.
Did a washing, mopped the floors,
washed some windows and did some chores
Cooked a dish of home dried fruit,
pressed her husband's Sunday suit.
Swept the parlor, made the bed,
baked a dozen loaves of bread.
Split some firewood and lugged it in,
enough to fill the kitchen bin.
Cleaned the lamps and put oil in, stewed some apples
she thought might spoil. Churned the butter, baked
a cake, then exclaimed,
"For mercy's sake, the calves have got out of the pen."
Went out and chased them in again.
Gathered the eggs and locked the stable,
returned to the house and set the table,
cooked a supper that was delicious
and afterward washed all the dishes.
Fed the cat, sprinkled the clothes,
mended a basket full of hose.
Then she opened the organ and began to play -
"When you come to the end of a perfect day.!"

I have come to believe in what I do deeply...as deeply as a  doctor, or a minister, or a lawyer.
In the church there is a concept of mentoring young wives...and I think as I get older I may.
young women are so torn these days.
Told that what they do is not really contributing to the family...
Money, in our society, seems to be the be all and end all.
To be equal they must do the work of two men...the work at  home and the work away from home.
In any job...you will be replaced, and barely missed in 10-20 years.
not so with your family.
If you pour into your family, they will pour into you.
Big hugs.
oh...and best sentence was yesterday when My daughter came home from high school with another academic letter and said "I couldn't have done this without you mom."
It helped take the sting out of today's words, I can tell you...just thinking about it.
As the bible says "The wisdom of this world is foolishness"
To that I can only say "AMEN!"

*I am working on my tongue...and as such, saying or talking about people directly is now forbidden unless it is kind. It's called a tongue fast. I may end up with a stump as a tongue by the end of the month, but it's worth it...the rest I find, still stands.

14 comments:

Jodie said...

My brother for years bugged me about not having a job....I finally told him "Look, we didn't have a mother at home growing up. I want to give my kids that, so stop telling me to get a job! Besides which raising twins is a LOT of work!" He hasn't bugged me much since about it. But it was always a slap in the face because I was staying home to extend more love to my family and others refused to see it that way!

Congrats to your daughter on her academic letter!

Jenn @ Cooking Aweigh the Pounds said...

Your MIL's words make my heart hurt. I've worked many jobs in my life and only discovered my purpose in life after my daughter was born. I know it's not for everyone, but it's the only job for me.

Bravo in your restraint to your MIL. I couldn't have been so kind.

Jill said...

I've been a working mom, then a stay at home mom, and now I'm a working mom again. The older my kids get the more I wish I didn't have to work so I could go to school functions and field trips and just be here for them after school to hear about their day. Yes, my working allows them to have health insurance and braces, but I sometimes wonder if it's the right trade off.

Christine said...

well, I'd say health coverage is a pretty good trade off. I did see the love in what my mom did going to work to provide for us. She got up at 4 and got home by 3 in the afternoon. She would then clean the house, cook and go to bed. It was a hard life for her. It was two jobs. It didn't make her equal to a man, it made her superior. If you can make time outside of work for just you and your kids, maybe a family game night...I think they will get it too. Probably already do. Hugs to you. You are doing a lot.

definingmore said...

In my opinion motherhood is the hardest (but most rewarding) job in the world. I respect so much what mother's do for all of us. I'm sorry Christine that your MIL doesn't see the same view.

I'm SO with you on the hospitality. As a childfree woman I appreciate my mom friends and their opening of their home and family to me.

On the other hand, I have known women who have children to avoid going out to a job. They are so surprised when they discover that caring for a child is more demanding and time consuming.

Sending hugs and loads of respect your way.

Melissa said...

After a big absence from blogging, I'm glad to check back in and see that your posts are even more awesome than when I left.

You look beyond awesome. Amazing!

F. McButter Pants said...

I went to work because I had to, but also because staying home with kids is a DANG hard job. Wished I could/would have seen it your way years ago. You're right being a mother is the most important, hardest job ever. I consider it an honor.

Congrat to your daughter. I love the she knows what a force for good you are in her life.

Another great post, Chris.

birchgirl said...

I really couldn't care less what other people do, but I think if you both work and have kids, whether by choice or necessity, you are obligated to find a way to do both seriously. And that is difficult.

hopefulandfree said...

Beautifully expressed. (Admire your steely redacting skills.)

Many years ago my young son (now grown) gave me a coffee mug that says "Every mother is a working woman." Yep. It still makes me smile when I drink my morning cup. Remembering the look on his face when I unwrapped his gift...that's what I love most!

Pretty Pauline said...

:(

Joy said...

Totally agree with you! Being a stay at home is more than a full time job!

If I could do it all over again, I would do it! Right now we are trying to get finances in order so I can stay home (my kids are grown). I just want to be a wife!

I've work 20+ years, 13 of them at the same place. Believe me, when I leave they will replace me. (Will take a couple of people, but they WILL replace ME!)

Enjoy every minute with your kids. It goes by soooooo fast!!

Keep focused!

Putz said...

well well, i just lost my comment, but i think reading through your post made me think of two things><<><>><><>you said and i quote i need to be a role model for all things young just getting started mothers, and then you mentioned service in the bachelor gentilemen everywhere category in the neighborhood<><><><><>the second was "you took a long time to leave me luccille with crops in the field, after all that mucking about in the sables and barns<><><>i am soooooo waiting for a reply

Putz said...

well sweet litlle chrisseeee, i have two thoughts that came into my warped brain as i read thhrough you're post<><><><>one being a homemaker gives you the opportunity to serve women, and did you say bacheler men??????????????you might have some explaining to do><<><>the second thought was

Christine said...

oh mr. putz....I was more thinking holidays and such. lmbo. You make me laugh. well...if you think about it, maybe I could get young women and b achelors together. lol. matchmakers...I know you didn't mean what I think you mean, you are too nice for that. ;oP