well, All of this emotional/ spiritual upheaval has brought me to a point of reckoning.
I t hink some of you remember me talking about putting my spiritual journey on the back burner when I started this whole weight loss process.
And in reality, I needed to...because my weight needed tending to.
It still does, but in a more practical day to day way.
Now it's time to work on who I want to be in Christ.
I have found a church.
I am going to apply for membership.
For many years I felt inferior. I guess that is the right word.
I was fat. I grew up in an abusive home.
I didn't have the same softness that many of the ladies at church had.
I have finally realized that I have been trying to remake myself under my own steam.
And you other ladies who are sisters in Christ know what I am talking about.
If I am going to do this, I have to let God get in there and tinker.
or rip it out and start again.
However that works.
And much like my wieght, I need to be held accountable.
So I am reaching out to my sisters in Christ ....Deb, Loretta, Myra, margene, Christine, Joy...and any others who come out of the woodwork.
I am working on my tongue...
\It has been an issue since I was 12.
I want to exhibit the fruits of the spirit with my words.
And since I don't have the type of mentorship I would like in my church...I am working on it.
I encourage you to keep me on the narrow path in regards to my speech on this blog.
I don't want to use my blog to slander, belittle, cuss, to use 'careless words'
Proverbs 12:23 (NIV) says, "A prudent man keeps his knowledge to himself, but the heart of fools blurts out folly."
I want my speech to reflect a Godly character...I am currently reading Elizabeth George's "A woman after God's own heart'.
I realize that this won't occur all at once, so I need spotters and encouragers. I have 3 times now in the last two days stopped myself from malicious speech mid sentence...and when my husband asks "what?" I say...'I was going to say something mean'.
It happens a lot more than I would like.
I am apparently full of judgement.
And considering the source, I think I need to focus on me.
So...while I strive to moderate my eating and exercising.
and work towards teaching my children, cleaning my home...taming my tongue.
I don't know why I thought life was boring.
There is plenty to do.
I guess th e key word here is discipline.
you need discipline to follow God, to get really close to him.
And I am starting now.
Talk at you all later.