You know, I like to extrapolate great life truths from seemingly insignificant and trite circumstances... it keeps me sane.
As you all know, my kids and I watched Tangled last night.. and as we were driving to Barnes and Nobles for our weekly treat/book fest, my youngest looked at me and said "Isn't it weird, she could have climbed out of her tower any time she wanted.' I said "Yes, she could have...but she was too afraid".
And any of you who have watched that movie know that she had a person who ran her down, made her feel incapable..
heck, at one point...the witch even suggested she was getting a bit chubby (how many other fat or formerly fat people had that one leap out at them...lol)
It got to the point where she felt safe in her tower even though she wanted desperately to climb out.
She had a voice telling her she couldn't...
telling her taking time for herself was selfish...
telling her the world was too big, that it was too hard...
My tower was my fat.
It kept me safe from men.
I thought it kept the scary and 'bad' feelings at bay... feelings like anger and fear... but all I did by eating it was turn it into depression and self loathing.
I thought If I felt all that anger, I would get eaten up by it..
Now, if you allow your anger to turn to bitterness...yes it will eat you.
But if you allow your anger to propel you..
to push you to make yourself better..
Then righteous anger is a motivator...
and I will tell you...
it beats the hell out of depression.
Then when you have propelled yourself to something you didn't think you could do...
That righteous anger turns to triumph and happiness.
And when you are triumphant and happy....you can start to look at the damaged people who hurt you with some compassion.
Because people who batter or abuse are generally people who have been battered and abused.
And many times, they are still stuck in their pain...
and because of their inability to look at their attitudes, and behaviors...They will never pull free from it.
And that deserves pity, not bitterness.
So...climb out of that tower.
It is a little scary out here...
But it's more fun than scary...
and at this point...the voice telling you that you can't make it doesn't belong to your witch of a mother or father or sister or gramma...
It's all in your head.
And you can shut it up whenever you choose to.
Have a great night.
caloric intake 1645
calorie burn 350
calories maintained for a 135 lb woman.
Thank You Loretta!....I got my style back. lol