Any sentence that starts or ends like that is rarely true.
I just realized something...I am starting to sound a bit like the beginning of grizzly adams...you know, a voice over introducing the story..
I self analyze way too much.
Onto my blog post.
calories in at 1440
and burn in at 550 calories.
Okay, So I am still going with the every day till may thing. I have been doing like a three on and then one 'off'...(meaning a three mile walk only) It's my easy workout...the other three are like two intense and one moderate. Todays was moderate.
I did 1 mile walk 100 calories burned
20 minutes on the stairstepper 180 calories burned
13 minutes on an arc trainer (cool and weird at the same time) 126 calories burned.
and finally 10 minutes on my precor 104 calories burned...
Then 158 situps which I counted as around 40 calories burned (have no real idea)
So, tomorrow is one hour on the precor and I always burn at least 600 on that thing...love it...plus upper body weights.
On to the title of my post.
On sundays, after the gym, I go grocery shopping.
I am very hungry after I work out, so it's an exercise in self control/self torture.
I pick up chocolate and see if it has suddenly become calorie free overnight..and upon finding it is not so...sigh and set it down.
So i buy a new curling iron (my old one broke..and I only had it for about three years...the one before I had FOREVER..my youngest told me that was because I never used it...well, I used my last one almost daily. I said "oh, that's true."....)
I decide since I am sitting at 820 calories that I was going to get a tall bold coffee at the starbucks in the lobby and put 2 T half and half (40 cal) and some splenda in it...but not before picking up the biscotti and sighing over it's 170 calorie 'pricetag' and setting it back down,and dismissing the pastry case as undoable if I wanted a decent dinner.
So I get my coffee and I am making it drinkable when a lady comes in...A lady who was about my size when I started.
The lady behind the counter greeted her (in much the same way the kfc drive thru guy used to greet me as I was coming through to pick up my deep fried cheese curds....with ranch dip)
She (the lady ordering) stated that she nearly didn't make it...and the other girl said "I wondered where You were, I have your order waiting...a grande white mocha with a brownie...
(that my dears is 910 calories altogether) I know.
I used to drink that drink...I was drinking that drink the day my flip switched.
The brownie I have looked up to see if it would be a viable calorie choice when I take my kids on fridays...it wasn't.
I had a little twinge right there.
Then she said something that stopped me in my tracks...
She said "I always look forward to coming here and getting this...so I can sit down and eat and be HAPPY."
And I thought, "Oh, that is not going to make you happy."
It will feel good for the ten to twenty minutes you are eating it....You will feel comforted..warm inside.
You will feel happy and homey and it will taste good.
But then you will notice that people are there, and wonder if they are judging you.
Then after, the guilt creeps in because you know you shouldn't have eaten it....it won't get you any healthier...
But, if she was anything like I was...she will just shut that voice off by getting another brownie.
And I looked down at my coffee and felt my stomach growl.
And knew that in just another hour I would be eating something that would move me towards my goals instead of away from them.
That never again would I look to a brownie for happiness...when I could create it myself.
Real happiness is feeling alive.
Being able to play tag with my daughter...being able to go all day and join in.
Being able to get in a swim suit and go swimming instead of sitting on the edge of the pool..ashamed of my size.
being able to BREATHE when I lay flat on my back.
Knowing I have probably (God willing) added years to my life through healthier eating and living.
Things that no brownie that was ever made, created or devised would be able to give me.
I GIVE ME HAPPINESS NOW.
breakfast 2 eggs 1 piece of toast 240 cal.
1 egg white omelette with 1/4 cup mozzerella and salsa 200 cal.
1 banana 100 cal.
2 cups coffee 240 cal.
1 cup coffee with half and half and splenda 40 cal.
salad greens 4 cups 40 cal.
tomato 3.5 ounces 21 cal.
cucumbers 6 cal.
2 T light dressing 40 cal.
4 ounces buffalo chicken breast 210 cal.
1 ounce feta 75 cal.
16 grams chopped pecans 125 cal.
2 vitamin chews and three crackers and 1 T butter...
(recording food is a pain...but it's working)
Have a good one guys,