captain obvious-A confederacy of dunces

Helloooo all...
It's captain obvious! Chris is busy twiddling her thumbs at the suggestion of a 'mr. putz' and has put forth the request that I, Captain obvious mull the multitudinous ways our government has putzed up nearly everything lately.

No problem...
Too easy...
here goes...

First Let's address Detroit
Since no one else can be bothered...
except al qaeda...
Who targeted Detroit for one reason and one reason only..

It was the cheapest ticket.
So, not only is Detroit on the verge of utter collapse..
It's also the best destination for terrorists on a budget.
I can't imagine why it's the cheapest flight....

And then there is the inability of the city government to actually impel the police force to live within city limits...EVEN AFTER OFFERING THEM FREE HOMES IN UPSCALE NEIGHBORHOODS!

I wonder if the police know something we don't...

maybe not....

It seems no one wants to live there.

Captain obvious isn't feeling very humorous tonight...
He thinks it is because Detroit is, simply put, a microcosm of the erosion of the America we used to know and love.
Once the heart of the heartland...producer of the American dream.
Now a wasteland of poverty, unemployment and crumbling infrastructure.
The schools are failing, government spending is out of control and no one wants to take responsibility...cut spending, cut taxes and put in place business friendly regulations.
Impose standards on students, and bring back a good manufacturing base that was the backbone of the middle class.
Instead we blather on about global warming and bullying.
We are all over the world trying to help people when right here in this country things are crumbling DOWN around our ears.

Now before I post this video...just know, When George bush took up dancing with various tribes and was constantly seen rocking himself back and forth and muttering 'stay the course' ...I was as disgusted then as I am with Mr obama playing football in brazil and ignoring reality.
While japan had a nuclear meltdown, Egypt collapsed and we bombed yet another country, Mr. obama made his college tourny picks.
Thank GOD!

Kansas for the win!
Now we know where to place our bets.
Well back to the idea of bombing countries to show our support.
Each bomb costs 500,000 a missile.
From what he can ascertain...Captain obvious has ascertained we have shot 136 missiles at a country we are trying to 'help'.
(the old "we are going to have to destroy this village to save it' cliche...)
so...math...lol. hold on for a second..I went to public school.
68 million dollars.
Here's a thought.
Maybe we could load 68 million dollars into a rocket and aim it at Detroit.
There's an idea.
Or at our schools.
Or at our ports and borders.
Or at our manufacturing base.
Instead of some despot in a third world crap hole who, once removed, will be replaced by another tin pot dictator. (just so long as he is our tin pot dictator)
we have thrown 68 million dollars into an as yet unchanged third world craphole...
Granted, it's a crap hole with smaller rocks cause we bombed the big ones.
At 500,000 dollars a pop.
American foreign policy
Making big rocks, small rocks.
We have A confederacy of dunces to lead us.
all hail our government.
and finally...this moment of zen.
I guess no one gave him a key.

And for you fans of obama who would like to point out that we have been lead by idiots for at least 11 years...this is for you.

He's the decider. I wonder who told him.

You are right...

I know it fills me with confidence.
How's about you.
Captain obvious for president 2012.
The common sense party....????
Vice president...Hank williams Jr.
(couldn't embed...worth viewing...it gave me chills)
obviously done,
Captain out.


Jodie said...

Hey Chris! I'm blogging over at biggerthanababyelephant.blogspot.com now. Hope you'll come over and follow me there. I haven't found an easy way to contact followers except blogging but I didn't want everyone to know that I blogged a new.


E. Jane said...

Right on, Chris! Fighting three "helpful" wars while allowing our economy, infrastructure, schools, etc. to go down the tubes is ludicrous and frightening! I think most people choose not to think about it in depth. I know I have been gulity of that at times. But we do need someone to get us on the right course. I don't know who that would be, because the "powers" in Washington and the Media will stick a fork in him or her like a short order cook. How about Captain Obvious for president? I'm with you!

Putz said...

the putz tries to promote the illusion that it is only he that putzes things up so badly but here iss dear deer dear chris telling us at least two others and a whole city that has apparently done a better job of messing up than me""""the PUTZ"""""way to go chris<><><>i applaud the effort and your capt, obvious has got the attention of my son tony<><><>he tells me i quote the obvious and none should do that, if it is obivois then keep your mouth shut about it, and when i complain he calls me capt. complaint

Anonymous said...

Captain Obvious, I'd vote for you in a heartbeat except that if there's one thing that 2008 taught us all, it's that presidentin' ain't no proper thing for a girl to do. *spits in anger*

I'm a classical musician, and I love the stuff. But the next time I hear one more amateur classical pianist or violinist act like the collapse of the Detroit Symphony is the worst tragedy to befall that city, I'm going to scream. They can't even afford ambulances in some areas of that town, and the absence of a couple top-flight cellists is a problem? Please!