For those who feel ugly.....

I have had a few encounters in real life and on the internet that have been making me think about this country and its ideal of beauty.
I mean, I have been getting this from all sides this last week...front, left and center...so if you think it's just YOU....It isn't. It's partly you, and partly you...and quite frankly....
So, back to that hollywood idea of 'beauty'.
From what I can tell, it is an adolescent boy with boobs, fish lips and no discernable expression because any life has been botoxed into non existence.
Don't get me wrong..you aren't going to find me pounding some sort of feminist dogma here, but I AM going to take a pot shot at hollywood beauty.
The hollywood beauty of anorexia, and the neurotic knee jerk plastic surgery at the first sign of a wrinkle and the shelving of women over forty.
The idea that wrinkles should be abhorred, rather than embraced.
Wrinkles come from experience, from life.
Wrinkles are a privilige alot of people don't get....old age is a blessing from God...he could have taken you a lot sooner.
When did women become merely the sum of their parts.

You, as women of God are not the sum of your body parts.
A well toned leg...a pert pair of boobs does not a woman make.
Some day madonna and her arms and abs of steel will sit, moldering in the ground.
Just think of The endless hours she has spent perfecting a dying body.
I am not downing exercise...it's good for you.
But like everything, it needs to be kept in perspective.

How much time do you think eleanor roosevelt or mother theresa spent gazing into a mirror?
Let's take a look at one of the most beautiful women in modern times.
marilyn munroe.
She was an image of beauty.
She spent her whole life trying to get people to see past that image.
She died of suicide, because she was so depressed, scared and alone.
She is still an image.
It's nice to be pretty....and firm and good looking....but do you think marilyn munroe would still be an icon if she had lived past her good looks?
How would she have been seen?
As an icon, or a has been?
Maybe she would have grown as a person once people stopped idolizing an ideal.
Who knows.
Now, lets look at mother theresa.
Not known for her cover girl looks.
But she will probably be inscribed in history as a saint.
What's in us shines much more brightly than the covering.
God loves the inside, so do our children, our husbands and our sisters, brothers and mothers and fathers and friends.
I heard this song today and I wanted to put it on my playlist but it wasn't available...so had to download it here.
Lyrics first...video below...

Days will come when you don't have the strength
And all you hear is you're not worth anything
Wondering if you ever could be loved
And if they truly saw your heart
They'd see too much

You're beautiful, You're beautiful
You are made for so much more than all of this
You're beautiful, You're beautiful
You are treasured, you are sacred, you are His
You're beautiful

Praying that you have the heart to fight
Cuz you are more than what is hurting you tonight
For all the lies you've held inside so long
But they are nothing in the shadow of the cross

You're beautiful, You're beautiful
You are made for so much more than all of this
You're beautiful, You're beautiful
You are treasured, you are sacred, you are His
You're beautiful

Before you ever took a breath
Long before the world began
Of all the wonders He possessed
There was one more precious
Of all the earth and skies above
You're the one He madly loves
Enough to die!

You're beautiful, You're beautiful
In His eyes

You're beautiful!
You are made for so much more than all of this
You're beautiful!
You are treasured, you are sacred, you are His
You're beautiful!
You are made for so much more than all of this
You're beautiful!
You are treasured
You are sacred
You are his.


Donna said...


Morgan said...

Wonderful post, and a good reminder. Sometimes it is really hard to see past what the media deems as beauty and see the beauty in ourselves.

Ms. M said...

Wonderful post! And, I LOVE that song. :)

Joy said...

Refreshing!! Awesome post Chris!!

Linda Pressman said...

Chris, My family is very surgery-happy and I don't know what it is with me (sanity, maybe?) but it's like it just doesn't compute with me, like I can't concentrate on the thought of Botox or the fillers or the other bull. I've ranted about this before to my friends but how does one believe in God and do that stuff? How do you not know that you're a spiritual being with a physical body and yet pump that body full of plastic. That's the opposite of faith, of belief. Maybe that's why I can't concentrate on it!

Rettakat said...

Thank you Chris...
And you are right... Mother Teresa was extremely wrinkled, yet she was such a beautiful soul!


Robin said...

The thing that you didn't mention about Marilyn Monroe that is interesting is that she wasn't a stick figure. She wore at least a size 10. Maybe bigger. She was a full figured gal. The thing that I think people found so fascinating about her was the dichotomy. The soft, child-like voice with the woman's body. She was actually very smart when you talked to her. She was this big mystery. She was never what she seemed. And I don't think she committed suicide. I think she was murdered. But that is just my opinion...

cmoursler said...

@ robin, yes she was smart...That was kind of my point. In the same way some people in our society can't seem to value older people, or people who aren't vogue beautiful...some people can't see past the exterior. Marilyn spent years trying to be taken seriously. But many people simply couldn't see past how she looked.

Anonymous said...

Lovely lyrics. I'd have liked the video better if it actually included people who were fat or old or ugly... Just sayin.

As far as feeling ugly, goes. Well, it's not that exactly. I've never been about the Hollywood standard. I suppose my post kind of sounded like that.

It's more like I went to sleep at the age of 35 and woke up when I was 70. It's not the beauty--it's the life that I lost that troubles me.

Seeing the physical results of weight loss--well, it has shown what I've missed--and won't get back. Reality bites.


M Pax said...

Folks have gotten a bit preoccupied with vanity lately, huh? Losing perspective.

I am not 18. I am not a starlett. I found a balance for me that works for a late 40's author who spends most of her day at a keyboard. I will never look like a starlett. Mostly because I'm past that age. Secondly, my passions take me elsewhere. I look good enough to stand before a crowd and not at all think about my physical appearance.

It doesn't matter what the rest of the world thinks. Not at all. It only matters what I think about me. And I'm not going to measure myself against an ideal that will only depress me for life.

We're beautiful at any size. When I accepted that, I made peace with myself. Fluffy me was as valuable as healthier me. She had things to teach me. If you don't listen, you won't learn. I think we need to learn to love all versions of ourselves. Only then could I move on.

Anonymous said...

GREAT post! I actually left my 1st/2nd husband (yeah, same guy) because of not only his lack of loyalty, but his incessant concern with my looks, my weight, whether I had make up on, my hair couldn't be short or pulled up, ad nauseum. Now I have a great husband who thinks I'm as beautiful without make up as with, and didn't love me any less when I hit 200 than I do at 130-140. THAT's the proof of a good man. :)

cmoursler said...

@ sunny...sounds like you lost well over 100 pounds of dead weight when you ditched him! lol.

karen@fitnessjourney said...

I wish more people truly felt this way. It saddens me when I see women with their faces stretched so much that they no longer look recognizable or their faces are injected with botox to the point where they can't smile any longer.

I lost my brother 4 weeks ago. He should have lived another 35 years. He was still a handsome man, but if he had his way, he would have died with a face filled with wrinkles and many happy memories of a life well lived. You are right, wrinkles are a gift.