Pit viper Reporting from the front lines...

Your skeptical blogger on the way in to class...
How great is it that I have my head squished back and still can't work up a decent double chin..lol. pretty great. The building is in the back ground...you can see the flower and the weight lifting bear on the sign.

It's your kick ass pit viper back from the front lines to tell you about my day of bad @ssery.
Well, I went in and signed a waiver (insert nervous giggle here)...then got into the circle on the big mat.
There were five of us students and two instructors.

Eric Lalone...Black belt, senior instructor today....
The other was a black belt named Mike...

It was very hands on.
Below I have posted some videos the defense institute has posted on youtube.
But basically this is what we did...except we were in gym clothes ,and not gi's.
We had four women and one man named...wait for it...spanky.

Spanky was about 5 ft. 3 and 300 lbs. He had a skull tattoed on the back of his head, and a grenade tattooed on his neck.
The first thing we practiced was holding our hands up...like you see the woman do in the video.
This is to put yourself in a position to strike back, without giving up your element of surprise.
If he invades your space (3 foot area)...whether to grab you or strike you, you do touch and go.
If you see the woman doing the palm to the face...that is to take away his vision.
A sequence would be fingers, palm, hammer and elbow.
You go high low. Hit in the face then knee to the groin. Then sweep the leg...
YOu never go back, only forward.
And that part down there where the dude grabs you from behind...
well, During that little gem spanky was my partner.
So I walked forward with Spanky on my back. lol.
Then I stomped his feet (not really..but to the side) head butt...butt but and then out the side.
We did that grab and slam against the wall thing. You get your hands up and talk...you say don't hurt me I will just get you my money..when they are distracted you punt...in the groin and then knee in the face or palm strike to the back of the head and sweep the knee and when they are down you stomp their head in.
It's called 'organized violence".
A few of the most important pieces of info are this:
You keep moving forward because you can move forward faster than he can backwards.
Once you begin, finish. You need to make sure that the thug is down and staying down...
They said you need a good 10 second start.
Then run like h*ll.

At the end of class we stood in the middle of the mat with our eyes closed. While a man dressed in pads did a blind attack.
He grabbed my hair and swung me to the mat...after that it was all a blur except at one point I was standing over him stomping him in the back, and kicking his padded head.
All in all, a good day. lolz
So, enjoy the videos...
Off to Take a hot bath and hope I recover
Rid the streets of crime and villainy
Pit viper out...


Unknown said...

All I know is I wouldn't wanna meet you in a dark alley! hehe :) Actually I think it is really cool that you did that! :)

Tammy said...

Dude I think that rocks!!! I think you're really going to enjoy this class...I can totally see you kicking someone in the padded head, lol.

Anonymous said...

I've wanted to take a self-defense class, but I was too self-conscious because I'm was fat to do it. sigh. Now I'm fat and OLD. chuckle. I should have done it when I was ahead! I'm thinking it over, tho. You've inspired me. Deb

Anonymous said...

Spanky? Spanky, really?? hehehehe

Last time I went to Karate I was 12 and I left because they made me do press-ups - Oh how I wish I'd stayed now!

Rebecka said...

It's so awesome that you are doing this for yourself.
Now the next time some sleazeball steps into your personal space, you can describe to him exactly what you're about to do if he doesn't step back RIGHT NOW!

Christine Jeske said...

You are so my hero.

Julie, The Accidental Fat Chick said...

Spanky? Really? That's hysterical!

I'm glad the class went well for you. It looks like it would have been challenging, but so worthwhile.

I gave you a couple of awards on my blog tonight, so go check em out. :)

Retta said...

Wow, that's some serious self-defense! Did you sign up for the street tactics course?

Yeah... that was funny...Spanky.

Daisygirl said...

I love it! You're gonna be such a bada$$!!!!


P. Rovillus said...

Thank you so much for this article. I have FM/CFS, and recently my thyroid became a little low–just a little, not enough though to explain the severe hair loss I have experienced. In the past year, I have lost at least half my hair–and I didn’t have much to begin with. I also have that fuzzy halo of either broken hair or new hair growing in.

Sean Anderson said...

Love it, Love it, Love it!!!!

You're a sweet weight loss inspiration...and someone that doesn't take any crap! Way to kick this whole journey onto another level!

I bet it felt good to whip Spanky's *ss.

My best always

Helen said...


South Beach Steve said...

Wow! This sounds pretty exciting and intense!

266 said...

Looks like you had a blast kickin' @ss and taking names (Spanky... snicker)!

Foodie Girl said...

Ah Spanky. I couldn't be more jealous of your class.

Melissa said...

I'm jealous! This sounds like so much fun!!

Kim said...

Holy crap, that sounds like fun! I can't wait to do something like this later on. Honestly, kinda knowing your vibe now...I was kinda scared for Spanky in this entry...lol...you're one tough gal Chris. I so wouldn't want to be the bad guy that meets you in a dark alley. LOL!

Shae said...

Gotta agree with Kim...Spanky should have been scared! lol. You are an inspiration to us all.