10.25.2010

The locus of control

Is inside of you...
I will write more about this tomorrow...because I am beyond tired right now.
I kicked rear in the gym.
walking sprinting...plus elliptical.
150 situps and weights.
Good food in at 1600...will be better tomorrow.

I am currently in the process of re reading the 7 habits of highly effective people.
It's first and most important premise is the idea of
locus of control...
That is not the term he uses...but it was a term we used while horseback riding.
Is what happens to you a function of what you create or what others do or what 'happens'..is it self determination or fate?
Is it fate or is it you?
Where does the control lie?
Ultimately, acknowledging that every decision you make is a decision you are responsible for...
Success lies within this paradigm.
Because if you truly believe you control nothing, you will CHANGE nothing.
For instance, I had a problem with eating.
For years I allowed my 'locus of control'...my sense of where the problem was...I thought of all of it as 'outside of my control'.
So, of course I couldn't do anything about my eating issues because it was stress, or my bad relationship with my husband, or my way of coping with emotional issues, or my bad childhood.
I felt so powerless because I assumed that the control and the ability to change things was out of my hands. If only others would _____________.
When in reality, it was all inside of me. All of it.
Yes, other people had issues that affected me.
But, I allowed others to affect me, even when it damaged me.
I had to learn how to take back my power, to internalize it and then to turn it.
So that I could tap the power that had been there the whole time.
I can't get into it all tonight,
But will tomorrow.
The only question I have is this...
What do you feel is outside of your control?
Have a good night guys.
Hugs,
Chris

6 comments:

Rebecka said...

The weather. Can't control the weather.
You can't control other people either, but you can control your responses to them.
And even though I can't control the weather I can choose to exercise indoors rather than cry because it's raining outside.

99ToGo said...

I can't control: other people, my biology, or most of what happens in the world. But I can control my reaction to them. I can control my attitude. I can control my own willingness to what God asks of me...

Sunny said...

A very, very powerful post. Great to find your blog! Congrats on all that you have accomplished, and I know your life is already so much more enriched because of it!

SeattleRunnerGirl said...

I am reading that book, too! I just heard so much buzz about it that I had to check it out. I'm at the beginning, but already love what I've read. For example, the difference between CHARACTER-driven people and PERSONALITY-driven people. Super interesting.

Juli's Journey said...

Great post. I am going to have to check out that book. Thanks, Chris

Mrs. Happy Pants said...

Some things you cannot control. Like Rebecka and 99toGo said, you cannot control some things, but you can control your reaction to them.
If you go through life thinking everything is beyond your control, well, then it is.
Personal responsibility for the win!