10.05.2010

Picking the important battles.

Hey all,
okay...
I love this format, it helps me organize my thoughts...gets it all out there as it were.

Mental and spiritual are one today.
thought for the day.
fight the good fight. The one worth fighting for....
I don't know if any of you have ever seen miracle...It's a movie about the 1980 U.S.A. hockey team.
I cried during that movie.
Not at the end like you might expect.
I cried at Jim Craig...Goalie.



I understood his job completely.
That was my job.
As mom of my home...I knew what my presence or absence could do.
I have lived on the other end of the stick.
A loving, but absent mom.
She had to work.
She was tired.
She couldn't block the crap.

today as I drove my youngest to school she said
"I thought about how I would feel if you had to work too, it would make me sad".
There are days like that that make my choice feel validated, although even if I never heard it said I would still do it.
I get to drive my kids to school, get to see them when they come home.
Homeschooling has afforded me the opportunity to really know my kids.
I mean, like the back of my hand.
It's My good fight.
My kids and my marriage.
Blocking.
Block and save.
Yes, it was the goals that won it..But if Jim hadn't stopped all the bad from happening that victory never would have happened.
For instance:
As a military family we constantly moved.
curriculum would change...our family would be under constant strain.
I could stay put and endure year long separations from my husband that weren't necessary.
I could put my kids in and out of schools.
What did I do.
I made two decisions to minimize the damage.

1.) I would never allow my husband to deploy somewhere alone when we could go with him.
Never.
That meant 6 moves in 14 years..one to Germany..one when I was 8 months pregnant for 11 months after we had just bought our house.
I knew when we started separating voluntarily, that would be the beginning of the end.
Block...and save.

2.) my kids.
I homeschooled. It kept us together as a family...mitigated moving stress and we became good friends within our family.
Block and save.

3.) complete honesty with my kids.
I don't lie to them, ever.
I know some people think it's necessary, but it isn't.
The hardest part was when Tim went back to Iraq after my oldest daughter's friend's father was killed.
She said "Will daddy die?"
What do you say?
Say no?
It happens...and if it did,would you ever believe you again?
Probably not.
Say yes, you scar the kids and you have no idea if it's true.
My answer.
Maybe.
But if your dad does die, know that he died fighting for what he believed in.
Your dad would want you to be proud.
He will most likely come back safe and sound. But it is a possibility.
We have a saying in our family, "Old enough to ask the question...old enough to get an answer."
My kids trust me.
I trust them.
We don't lie to each other.
Block, save.


Pick your battles wisely, all the secondary crap is just that...crap.
Your health is a good fight to win.
It can mean the difference between there being a goalie in the net when it's your team's butt on the line...or an empty net.

Physical:
awesome sauce.
okay, I have to say something about Jack Lalanne.
I have been alternating workouts.
three days a week I do a three mile walk and then "30 minutes with Jack Lalanne"
on his website. (along with 150 situps.)
It's workouts from his old program.
I did this last night.
Me and my sophie have been doing the exercises together for the last week or so.
It seemed light duty to me.
We laughed through it.
laughs on me.
I go to the gym today to do my elliptical only to realize my thighs are sore.
I mean sore.
(after the elliptical I did my upper body toning and a half mile walk to stretch my legs...instead of upping my weight on my weights, I upped my reps to 3x15 for each exercise...back extension, flies, lat pulls and tricep extensions.)
Jack kicked my rear.
Hello students my right eye. lol.
I will be doing another walk and another jack workout tomorrow.
I will let you know how it goes.
My calories came in at 1630 again..again all good calories.
My burn was 600 on the elliptical...plus weights which I never know how to calculate so don't.
Hope you all had a great day and are doing well,
I know I am,
Hugs,
Chris

16 comments:

Ice Queen said...

I have seen that movie and I know the scene you referenced. (I can't watch he clip, right now.)

I have also always been honest with my son. My mother didn't lie to me when I was growing up. Like you she believes that if you are old enough to ask the question, you are old enough to hear the answer. I took the same approach when I was raising P. I think that being honest with your children helps to foster honesty in them. P. is almost 22 and still will not lie to me. :D

Julie, The Accidental Fat Chick said...

Your decisions to protect your family are similar to decisions I made long ago myself. If we had ended up having to move all over the place, I definitely would have chosen to homeschool. Even though my marriage has major issues, I'm still thankful for the choices I made & know its the right thing for my son... and ultimately that's what matters most to me. :)

SeattleRunnerGirl said...

1. I LOVE that movie. One of my favorites.

2. Your philosophy that a kid old enough to ask the question is old enough to get the answer...that really resonates with me.

3. I LOVE that you are working out w/ Jack LaLanne!!

Linda Pressman said...

Chris, I'm with you on the "Old enough to ask, old enough to get an answer" issue. Surprisingly, my son keeps wanting me to hide information from my daughter but I feel like if she knows enough to have a question she deserves an honest answer.

While I don't homeschool, I've been very picky about the schools my kids go to and I do consider myself and my availability to be supplemental to them. I don't answer my phone when I pick them up (unless it's a husband emergency) and give them my full attention.

Amber said...

Sounds like a good day.
Keep it up!

Annalisa@Gracie'sGarden said...

According to a little book I have, if you weigh about 80 kg (175 lbs) you burn 6 cal/min during moderate exercise including light weight training, brisk walk, moderate cycling. Weighing 60 kg (132 lbs) you burn 5 cal/min. If you are doing heavy exercise including jogging, vigorous cycling, heavy weight training you burn 8 cal/min for 132 lbs, and 10 cal/min for 175 lbs. Hope that helps :)

GREAT POST. Got me thinking. A lot. Thanks for sharing.

E. Jane said...

I love the movie, but I am old enought to remember watching the actual game with my family. No one who saw that game will ever forget it. Regarding the movie, Kurt Russell should have won an award. He was great!

By the way--it should be said that you take wonderful care of your family.

Anonymous said...

Chris, I love your heart and the way you care for those you love.

Deb

Retta said...

I don't remember reading before WHY you homeschool. I can see how it would be the healthiest choice for your family.

I admire how you take your role to heart. Mom's like you are the unsung heroes!

Loretta
=^..^=

Member of the Justice League said...

This post made me do an internal review about whether I'm focusing on the right priorities. I appreciate the invitation to self examination.

Thank you. You're often an example to me.

The Traveler said...

Great post.

Bonum Certamen Certavi

Cursum Consumavi

Fidem Servavi

Tammy said...

I love this post Chris. I admire the way you take care of your family...I'm sure all the sacrifice is well worth it. :)

Helen said...

Posts like this one make me want to move in with you. Or at the very least, move next door to you so we could be BFFs.

Cole Walter Mellon said...

That movie made me cry because I remembered that - true story - my local TV station played the movie "Heidi" instead of the game. Dumbasses!

Beautiful post, Chris.

Julie Lost and Found said...

I also love your heart. You are one awesome lady. I thoroughly enjoy reading and always walk away having gleaned some wisdom from you.

Robin said...

This is one of your most interesting posts yet. Very insightful into you and the choices you have made. I like the block, save metaphor. Or reality. The goalie metaphor. I also think that when kids are old enough to ask the question, they deserve the answer. That is good parenting. I laughed at your sore legs. Sorry. Life is funny like that, no? Sometimes we think we are getting one thing and we get another. Go Jack!