I have come across a few blogs here and there and there seems to be a theme running through them.
On blogs where the weight loss has stalled apart from injury or medical reasons...meaning, where no good reasons exist, there seems to be a theme.
That theme is...lack of importance attached to the goal.
Oh, there is a lot of chest thumping and self flagellation, but no forward momentum.
I used to do this.
I am so fat, and I am so tired.
I wish I wasn't such a fat pig.
blah blah blah...
Now, I am not discounting feelings of low self esteem.
They stink.
When your are obese, You really do feel bad about yourself.
But yet, you don't attach level 10 importance to your health.
Quick.
Think of something that you would never let slip.
Would you let your five year old walk home from school through a rough neighborhood?
Would you leave the kid with Leon, the neighborhood pimp?
Would you start shooting heroin?
Would you stop paying your house payment because you were 'just too busy."
Would you tell your kids to skip doing homework or going to school, so they could just hang with you?
No.
You need to, if you want to lose weight in a consistent manner...attach level 10 importance to your weight loss efforts.
It isn't a 'well, I would like to"
It's a "it's going to happen, and anyone trying to stop me is going to draw back a bloody nub."
It isn't "well, I guess I am going to have to eat cardboard until I get down to my goal weight and then I can eat again."
It's "I'd better find a new way of eating that I like and enjoy and can live with for the rest.of.my.life."
It's "My kids are watching me, and how I treat myself will inevitably be how they treat themselves when they grow up."
Or it will be..."I wish I had lost weight when I had the opportunity, now I am 50 or 60 and dying of congestive heart failure."
You are important.
This is important.
It may be the most important thing you will ever do.
So instead of beating yourself up
Say "I'll feel worse about myself tomorrow, today I will treat myself with kindness and respect...I will feed it less and move it more."
Do it for you.
Hugs,
Chris
22 comments:
Great post!
I hope a few will hear this and listen!
Good message...I keep trying to remember this. The self-esteem thing isn't a problem, but my perfectionism gets in the way sometimes...and it shouldn't. There's no good excuse for not trying...our lives depend on it. Thanks for this. :)
To quote you to you, "If you believe it, you can make it happen!" You're right, about all of it, and it especially comes home to me what an incredible role model I am to my kids of health and fitness, and that they don't have to be embarassed of me. Well, they get embarassed of me for other reasons, but not for my weight!
I am 59 and have congestive heart failure.
The old me would've been in a huff, and gotten defensive and felt you were "talking about me??!"
But the new me KNOWS you weren't including me in that group that doesn't have a high importance level. Because I agree with everything you said. This is life or death important to me. And I can honestly say that I am doing my best most days. And I have self-respect and hope because of that.
I, too, hope anyone who is down or discouraged or doubting... or for whatever reason are struggling... will have an open heart and see how very much you want to help them by telling it like it is.
Excellent.
Loretta
=^..^=
whoops.
I did not know that loretta...I am sorry. That was more of a 'this is what could happen' post than a look what happens post.
For the record, Loretta is one of the most dedicated people I know regarding weight loss.
WE all have our struggles, and Loretta handles hers with dignity daily.
I never knew that about Loretta.
This isn't aimed specifically really, just more generally. I want people to know they are important, and to not let it go till it's to that extreme.
apologies if it's a little too pointed. I don't mean it meanly, more of a kind of 'you can do it...' type thing.
Importance level. It's paramount. Great way to put it on the page!
My best always
Sean
This brought to mind something that my best friend told me. My friend, Chris, has Multiple Sclerosis. She told me that she was very insulted when a woman told her she was lucky that she had a reason to motivate her to be healthy. She tactfully told the woman that she would still eat right and exercise even if she didn't have a medical condition.
It's "My kids are watching me, and how I treat myself will inevitably be how they treat themselves when they grow up."
I refuse to repeat the cycle I have been on. My mother has the lowest of the low self esteem and I won't let that happen to my girls.
This is a great post! I am just learning this. That I have to put my efforts to become healthy as a top priority.
Very well said Chris. I tell people this all the time when they ask me how I can get up at 4 am to exercise. It's an appointment I will not break.
Great post. I just love you Chris. Now I'm off to feed it less and move it more.
You are so correct. I wish my mother in law could read this, but then she'd find my blog, and well, not happening!
Good morning, Chris!
Just wanted to make it crystal clear... I loved this post, and am not offended or upset at all. :-)
In fact, I am GLAD that I had that split second of "does that include me??" Because I had the wonderful feeling of self-respect and sense of accomplishment that came when I looked at my efforts, and could genuinely say it didn't apply to me... that I had a high importance level.
It's a GOOD thing to evaluate every now and then. And if our journey can't stand up under a little HONEST scrutiny, then somethings amiss. Self-honestly is crucial to our success.
Sean Anderson is my wt loss hero.. and Chris is my wt loss heroine! They are both totally honest and dedicated, and I have learned so much from them.
So, keep telling it like it is. :-)
Loretta
=^..^=
"You are important."
AMEN! One of my cards I read daily says:
"I am worth of the time, effort, and expense that attaining a healthy weight will require."
We are all WORTHY of it. WE MATTER.
Thanks, Chris, for the reminder.
I now consider eating healthy and working out the indulgence, the pampering. It's not about length of life, it's about quality of life. I am amazed at how different my life has become since embarking on my quest to change the path it was on. Eating well and regular exercise are living.
Excellent post Chris. Thanks for the reminder.
Well said, Chris! This was a great post and a wonderful reminder for me that this is more than a diet but is a matter of life and death. Keep telling it like it is!
Amen!
And I am off to give some medical attention to a few people with bloody nubs . . .
;)
oh really is all i have to say, oh really????
Excellent points. I know there have been plenty of times in my life when I've found myself just not caring about weight loss, but not willing to actually say that out loud. You're right - we have to attach the right level of importance to it.
Added you to my blogroll. I'll definitely be following. :)
You are SO right on. Excellent post. (I type that a lot here!)
It's about quality of life, plain and simple. *everything* improves when one gets on board: self-esteem, health, time, fatigue--everything. We are all so worth it.
So true! It's easy to let everything else come first but at some point you have to put yourself on your priority list. This has been hard for me the past few years but it's getting easier every day. Thanks for the reminder.
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