The truth about weight loss...

Is this..
It's easier to create a deficit when you are fatter.

There I said it.
I think I have lost 3 lbs this month.
That being said...

*heads up to the male readers....

Tom has made another early appearance.
Although I don't know if it's early or finally correct.
It has been moving backwards now for three months.
from the 18th...to the 8th to now.
the 31rst/1rst...
So It could be a 21 day cycle.
Maybe my hormones are straightening out...who knows.
* male readers, howdy again...lol
I will know in a week if this was a three pound month or a tommish fluke.
I did miss a few days because of that weird blood sugar thing.
Which by the way I am starting to think is an iron deficiency.
After 3 days of eating higher calories...I went back for one day to lower...and had heart palpitations.
I said to my husband "I would think it was an iron problem, but I don't have any bruising...(which is always a sign for me.)
Well, he says...Yes, you do...all up the back of your legs.
And so I started taking Iron pills two days ago and kept the lower calorie intake (around 1500) and things seem to have straightened out a bit. I am still tired..but am not getting woozy or light headed anymore.
I will give it a week to see if it turns a corner.

So,  back to creating a deficit.
I added it all up.
If I eat 1450 calories almost every day next month..burn 600 calories 21 days 300 calories 7 days (on the days we travel) and have one 100 calorie deficit day plus my one high calorie day...I will lose 4.5 lbs.
I actually added it up folks.
Here's the thing.
I should be more satisfied with my body now that it is a much lower weight.
I have lost an incredible amount of weight.
But there are still times (like today) that I look in the mirror and all I can see is the fat.
I still look pudgy.
I have people tell me "You look great!"
There are days when I feel it.
I feel great..on top of the world.
Then there are days like today.
I get on an elliptical and kick @ss.
I get on a stairstepper and kick @ss.
I do 210 sit ups.
Then I get on a scale and it reads 157, a weight I would have given my right eye for a year ago.
I remind myself of how far I've come.
Somedays it works.
And somedays I want to cut the rest of this fat off with a dull knife.
Then I remind myself that this kind of body hatred was what got me into trouble to begin with.
I weigh in tomorrow.
And 3 lbs is better than no lbs.
It's a loss.
It's 10,500 calories...
A 340 calorie a day deficit.
If it's 4 lbs...it was a 451 calorie a day deficit.
5 months of 4 lbs will be 20 lbs.
In five months at that rate of loss (which is very doable) I would weigh what I weighed when I met my  husband...
If I don't quit.
If I don't give in to the 'not good enough' mentality.
So I won't give up..
Don't you give up.
Oh, I forgot to write four more things.
I will write one tonight.
4.) I used to go out in the middle of the night when I was a teenager..two or three in the morning...because I had terrible insomnia.  I would ride my 10 speed down the middle of highway 10. Three miles from my house was the biggest hill in the area. It was called firetower hill...It was a two mile upgrade and a one mile down grade.   I would get to the top of firetower hill and then using my knees ( I rode my bike so much I could generally steer my bike by leaning) and I would use the moonlight hitting the reflectors in the middle of the road  to guide my bike. I would hold my hands out to the side and pretend to fly through the darkness. It was about 10 minutes of bliss, down hill on pavement.  My mom would have a heart attack and die if she read this.

I will write the last three tomorrow....
Now,  A big Thank You to every soldier who has fought and lived, or fought and died for this country.
A special Nod to all of the vietnam veteran's out there who never got the welcome home they deserved.
If I could throw a one woman parade for you I would.
For you Uncle Richard, Uncle junior, Butch and so many others.



Annalisa201 said...

It's true! I'm reading all about 3lb/week losses with only 200 min of exercise, thinking that is so unfair... but then again, I am wearing size 10 jeans, and they are, of course, saying that's not fair... Perspective right?

Never give up. Just do your best Chris. Things will get better :)

Rettakat said...

Yep... we'll just keep plugging away, and we WILL eventually get there!!


Julie, The Accidental Fat Chick said...

Yep, it is so much easier to have a deficit when you weigh more... but I wouldn't want to go back to that for anything in the world. Be proud of the 3 lbs and remember how it all adds up in the long run. :)

Lol, my word verification is "fartisms." Bet I could write a post about that.

Dominique said...

Wow, you absolutely do look great! At this point you should be content with 3 lbs. a month. That's 36 lbs. in a year, but I expect you don't have that far to go. You are an inspiration!

carla said...

yesyes to what everyone else said.
it may come off slower now, Sister, but thats because you are so so so close to maintaining.

She woke up FAT said...

Things are really going slower for me. Only 4 oz this week. But I don't care how long it takes I will keep going. Be it one pound or one ounce.

Alix said...

I totally get it Chris, because I live it every day. We adjust to our new weight, but unless it keeps plummeting our eyes begin playing tricks on us. We get that body dysmorphic thing going on and our perception becomes a little skewed. I guess it's just a hazard of losing weight and I hope it will balance out sooner or later.

In the mean time, just keep keeping on. You know what works for you and in the long run, it's about health, right? Doing right by your body and knowing you are healthy. We don't want to be skinny - we want to be fit! Fit and healthy. And happy!

So sorry I've been MIA. We've been so busy with company and stuff, I've really all but abandoned my blogging. But I'm back and I've come straight over!

Missed you my good friend. So happy to be back with you again.

Thrice Blessed said...

It is definitely easier to lose weight when you are heavier. I am not totally convinced though that 3,500 calories always = 1 pound. I have had times when I've measured everything, counted every calorie, and I know I should lose 2 or three pounds, but instead I gain. Other times I eat half a pizza and see a loss the next day. I think there are times when all of our bodies just do what they "want to". :\

Hanlie said...

I hate the slackers in the gym!

Our house was always locked up like Fort Knox, so there would have been NO WAY I could ever have escaped to have nocturnal wanderings... Lucky you!

Juli's Journey said...

I have awarded you the Beautiful Blogger award. You constantly inspire. Thank you!!!

You can get your award at my blog at

TJ said...

Tom is a JERK! lol (he is at my house this week BOO!)

The weight loss is getting harder & harder for me.... I know a small amount or a maintain is celebration enough for me these days. I need to cheer all of those NSV I can.

M Pax said...

It is harder. I have not lost much if anything in 2 years. But in size 8, I don't complain. :D

You may be in perimenopause. Your blood sugar thing could have been hormones, too. I'm in that. Gah!

99ToGo said...

First, thanks for your tribute to our vets :)

Second, I almsot had a heart-attack and died after reading about your night-time bike rides on that highway. It probably has something to do with being a (s)mother...there was a day when I would have thought it a bit strange, but mostly fascinating. Now, I just think I'll lock the girls' bikes up each night when they get a little older :)

Kim said...

Hey, make sure you intake a lot of vitamin C too. Vitamin C makes iron absorb very efficiently...it won't absorb well w/o it. I hope it gets better.
Sounds fun flying down the hill. I used to go out late at night when I was a teen too. I didn't do anything good though. lol

Anonymous said...

Don't you dare give up.

I need you.

I promise not to give either.

Janece said...

THANK YOU THANK YOU for reaching right into my heart and mind and pulling out the stuff I am afraid to say out loud. I have only lost 48 pounds...peanuts compared to you. But it's still 48 pounds. That 48 pounds put me weighing less than what I weighed 14 yrs ago when my husband and I got together...but doesn't make me thin by any means at all. Most days I look in the mirror and see how much further I have to go rather than how far I have come.

WE are beautiful, valuable, wonderful, and we are winners! Any loss is a LOSS. *happy dances* for us!!!


Robin said...

First, don't quit. Of course you won't quit. You've come so far. The last part of the journey is the slowest. Yesterday, I couldn't write a Memorial Day post. I knew I didn't have that in me to do it justice. I posted the Trace Adkins song ARLINGTON. It makes me boohoo every time I watch it.

Anonymous said...

I feel pretty confident that you will keep on keeping on.

You have come so far and have provided so much inspiration to others.

✯FiTCETERA✯ said...

I should've known after burying my face in a container of granola that something was up.
And sure enough ...

Good gawd, Chris. The MATH!! The MATH!!!
My head is spinning. :D

There is no "quit" in Chris.

outdoor.mom said...

i think you look really really good :-) with the health problems - i think you should listen to your body. Those last few pounds are not worth doing damage to your body. If you need the calories then so be it. Don't jepordize all you've already done. I think you should start working on how you see yourself emotionally. You are a strong person. You are recognizing you are seeing yourself incorrectly. Postive confessions - what ever it takes. The person you are now is for sure NOT fat.