It's easier to create a deficit when you are fatter.
There I said it.
I think I have lost 3 lbs this month.
That being said...
*heads up to the male readers....
Tom has made another early appearance.
Although I don't know if it's early or finally correct.
It has been moving backwards now for three months.
from the 18th...to the 8th to now.
So It could be a 21 day cycle.
Maybe my hormones are straightening out...who knows.
* male readers, howdy again...lol
I will know in a week if this was a three pound month or a tommish fluke.
I did miss a few days because of that weird blood sugar thing.
Which by the way I am starting to think is an iron deficiency.
After 3 days of eating higher calories...I went back for one day to lower...and had heart palpitations.
I said to my husband "I would think it was an iron problem, but I don't have any bruising...(which is always a sign for me.)
Well, he says...Yes, you do...all up the back of your legs.
And so I started taking Iron pills two days ago and kept the lower calorie intake (around 1500) and things seem to have straightened out a bit. I am still tired..but am not getting woozy or light headed anymore.
I will give it a week to see if it turns a corner.
So, back to creating a deficit.
I added it all up.
If I eat 1450 calories almost every day next month..burn 600 calories 21 days 300 calories 7 days (on the days we travel) and have one 100 calorie deficit day plus my one high calorie day...I will lose 4.5 lbs.
I actually added it up folks.
Here's the thing.
I should be more satisfied with my body now that it is a much lower weight.
I have lost an incredible amount of weight.
But there are still times (like today) that I look in the mirror and all I can see is the fat.
I still look pudgy.
I have people tell me "You look great!"
There are days when I feel it.
I feel great..on top of the world.
Then there are days like today.
I get on an elliptical and kick @ss.
I get on a stairstepper and kick @ss.
I do 210 sit ups.
Then I get on a scale and it reads 157, a weight I would have given my right eye for a year ago.
I remind myself of how far I've come.
Somedays it works.
And somedays I want to cut the rest of this fat off with a dull knife.
Then I remind myself that this kind of body hatred was what got me into trouble to begin with.
I weigh in tomorrow.
And 3 lbs is better than no lbs.
It's a loss.
It's 10,500 calories...
A 340 calorie a day deficit.
If it's 4 lbs...it was a 451 calorie a day deficit.
5 months of 4 lbs will be 20 lbs.
In five months at that rate of loss (which is very doable) I would weigh what I weighed when I met my husband...
If I don't quit.
If I don't give in to the 'not good enough' mentality.
So I won't give up..
Don't you give up.
Oh, I forgot to write four more things.
I will write one tonight.
4.) I used to go out in the middle of the night when I was a teenager..two or three in the morning...because I had terrible insomnia. I would ride my 10 speed down the middle of highway 10. Three miles from my house was the biggest hill in the area. It was called firetower hill...It was a two mile upgrade and a one mile down grade. I would get to the top of firetower hill and then using my knees ( I rode my bike so much I could generally steer my bike by leaning) and I would use the moonlight hitting the reflectors in the middle of the road to guide my bike. I would hold my hands out to the side and pretend to fly through the darkness. It was about 10 minutes of bliss, down hill on pavement. My mom would have a heart attack and die if she read this.
I will write the last three tomorrow....
Now, A big Thank You to every soldier who has fought and lived, or fought and died for this country.
A special Nod to all of the vietnam veteran's out there who never got the welcome home they deserved.
If I could throw a one woman parade for you I would.
For you Uncle Richard, Uncle junior, Butch and so many others.