5.02.2010

Why the morbidly obese need a personal trainer...and an embarrassing moment...

Hello..
Long title huh.
Well I recieved this award

...and I have to do one of  a few things...
1. Get really excited that you got the coolest award EVER!
2. Choose ONE of the following options of accepting the OMB award:
(a) Get really drunk and blog for 15 minutes straight, or for as long as you can focus.
(b) Write about your most embarrassing moment.
(c) Write a “Soundtrack of your childhood” post.
(d) Make your next blog a ‘vlog’/video blog.
Basically, you’re talking to the camera about whatever.
(e) Take a picture of yourself first thing in the morning,
before you do anything else (hair, make up, etc) and post it.
3. Pass the award on to at least three, but preferably more, awesome bloggers as yourself.
Don’t forget to tell them.
I'd write a soundtrack to my childhood, but nobody wants to listen to a dirge lmao...
So I'm super excited to share with you my most embarrassing moment ever.
So,My husband and I take our children bowling.
My then 7 year old had a bit of a hard time rolling the bowling ball down the lane.
Well, she rolls it and it only goes halfway down where it stalls in the middle of the lane.
(You can see where this is headed, can't you....well good for you, I didn't.)
Well, Sophie was soooo upset.
I told my baby not to worry, mama would fix it.
(Yes I am one of those idiots who didn't really think)
I head down the lane gingerly....and made it.
I pick up the bowling ball.
I turn around...
And wham.
In the best impression ever of slapstick comedians the world over.
My feet fly out from under me and I land flat on my back and the bowling ball goes flying up the lane.
Which would have been bad enough,
But in the spirit of 'Ain't she the coolest mom ever!'
I had also gotten a ten dollar roll of quarters so the kids could have fun at the arcade later....
Which I had unrolled  to get my oldest a grape fanta for a quarter just prior to starting our bowling game...which left $ 9.75 in loose change in my shirt pocket.

A pocket that  wasn't buttoned.

Which meant ALL that loose change went flying into the air when my feet flew out from under me...
(Oh, and Did I mention that there was a bowling tournament and we had managed to score the last lane in the place.)
So as my 262 lb frame lay splayed out in the middle of the bowling lane.
My husband standing at the top of the lane with his hands covering his face.
My oldest, still grasping her prized grape fanta in her ungrateful clutches, bent over cackling so hard she was hyperventilating, the only sound in the otherwise suddenly deathly quiet bowling alley...
Only my youngest, too naive to realize what a complete ass I had made of myself yells...
"Mama, are you Okay?!"
I say "yes baby", while staring at the ceiling..
Dead silence as every eye was trained on me..I managed to roll off my back, get on my knees,
and bow..
Allowing everyone to laugh as they ought.
After collecting my quarters, recieving a good scolding from the bowling manager, and finishing our game.
I was able to laugh about it.
They still bring it up.
Humiliation is fleeting, mockery lasts forever.
Tappity tap tap...
Hmm...
robin from a daily dose
The fat chick from the fat chick weigh
and
Kelli from my journey to a new life
You're on... 

Okay,
So after the gym tonight I went grocery shopping...I overheard the young bagger talking about working out.
So I asked him about it on the way out.
He said he was studying to be a personal trainer for young adults.
I said,
"Oh how interesting...Do they have personal trainers for obese and morbidly obese people?"
He said, "No. Not that I know of.'
I said "You would think they would...considering how many people in America are obese or Morbidly obese."
He said "That's true."
He then said " I try to be really disciplined about what I eat, cause you can work out but if your eating is terrible you will stay fat...My wife does too...she has had three kids and only weighs 110 lbs."
(I almost applauded sarcastically)
(Meaning I suppose that slobs who gain weight lack discipline.)
I said.
"I lost over 100 lbs. I think people need to deal with their food addiction. That is a large part of it."
He just looks at me like I have grown a third eye.
He said "Wow, that is a lot of weight. Great job!"
two seconds ago (unbeknownst to him) I had been an undisciplined slob...now I wasn't.
You see, this is what I am talking about.
People who have never had a weight issue...don't get it.
I can see how obese or morbidly obese people would feel judged by this guy.
I did and he didn't view me that way.
I don't think I will ever be that mindset.
I have been there.
I know who I was and a lazy, undisciplined slob wasn't it.
I was depressed.
I was hopeless.
But I wasn't lazy.
I just put all my effort and energy into everything but me and my health.
I almost told the boy to put on an extra hundred pounds and wear it for a week.
See how tired he is.
Well, Had a great day, stayed in under calories.
3 eggs, 1 toast, 2 cups of coffee, one granola bar, one small bag beef jerky one hamburger (homemade with bun pickles, tomato and onion) and carrot sticks.
1370 cals.
Have a great day guys.
Chris out...

23 comments:

Amber said...

Don't you love how those always happen when you have a large audience. I won't tell you mine, well not on here anyway.

Bet that guy will think a bit tonight about what you said.

Glad you had a good day.
*amber*

Holly said...

Oh my now that is an embarrassing story but I LOVE that you took a bow at the end. Way to lighten the mood!

snoconegirl said...

wow what a moment..i wonder if i can top this one..thank you so much for the awards..they are awesome..you are doing great..i think people do have to live our life before they can judge us...some people just talk..i loveya,kelli

Brenda said...

I can relate--minus the quarters--on the bowling incident. I didn't know if you cross that line the lane is slicker than snot. Then I couldn't get back up and had to roll over to the gutter just to get my footing. Sheesh! My oldest was laughing her head off too.

Robin said...

Well, I am not sure that this award is an honor;-) I think you chose me because I have already aired so many humiliating stories and you KNOW that there must be more. Egads. As for the rest of the content of your blog... 1) People cannot help but be judgy. We see things through the lens of our own experience. That kinda sorta sucks, but it is the way it is. It is why the person who has been through the most crap is the most empathetic. 2) It is also why you can't really judge someone else's situation until you've walked in their shoes. Kinda like what you thought about that guy. You wanted him to try on a an additional 100 lbs for a week just to see how it feels. 3) People who are unsympathetic about my migraines... well, let's just say I would love to transfer my migraine to them for about a week and then we can sit down for a chat. I think our conversation would be very different.

The thing I continually tell myself is that NO ONE makes it out of this lifetime without pain of some kind. Their pain will/may be different than mine, but it will hurt them deeply. So, everyone is deserving of kindness if I can possibly muster it up.

Now, I am going to bed. I will think about my most humiliating moment tomorrow. Sadly, my list is long. I think this will be a tough call.

anne h said...

Every eye was trained on you....
Zoinks!
Cool story.....cool lady - you!

Kim said...

Wow, ouch! Man, that is pretty embarassing. I'm sure if I thought long and hard I could probably top it. lol.
As for the rest of your post, gosh lady, you are so dead on. Can I quote you in my next post? lol. Anyway, thanks for putting into words for us how it is for a lot of us. For me, sure, there was and is some laziness in there, but not the way the world views laziness. Mine was just giving up after so many tries. I know better now...still difficult though. Thanks for the great post. :)

Deb Willbefree said...

Well, okay, the second half of your post was serious--and hit on a pet peeve of mine, probably of every overweight person. All of a sudden I have different character traits when I'm fat than when I'm thin. How exactly does that work you thing?

But, it was a little hard to read the second part since I still had tears in my eyes and on my cheeks from laughing at the first half. lol!!! (My top weight was a bit over 252--I could see that happening. yep.) So glad you weren't hurt, tho!

Thanks for the howl and for reminding me not to judge.

Deb

Joy said...

I just found your blog - love it!! I too loved this story. I laughed my head off. Mostly because I can totally relate, as I too have done many things like this. I am sure when we are thin we will still do bonehead things like this. We need stories to tell. Keep up the great work - you look great!! Hugs!

Thrice Blessed said...

hahaha! It sounds funny now, but I have seen things like that happen, and usually my first response is to wonder if the person is okay, then if they are, to LAUGH MY BUTT OFF!

:D

spunkysuzi said...

Congrats on the award!!
That is a funny story. Bowling and i don't have a good relationship, it started with ripped pants :)

Seth said...

I had to suppress my laughter. I try so hard not to laugh at some of the things that you do -- but it's so easy too. :)

That kid sounded like one of those cocky know-it-all's to me. If we had more people who knew what it was like being overweight and training the overweight...a change in our nation could happen on the physical front.

That would require of course, more of the overweight people to lose the weight and then to train the overweight -- it can start small and turn into a huge thing.

My Big Fat Super Super Obese Blog said...

OMFG..you and me going bowling some day lol!! That is hilarious...sorry but I'm laughing with you sweetie!

I loved the second half of your post. They truly don't get it. I suppose that may be one good thing about the last year of my blog. Anyone can see how much I thought about dieting, exercising, etc and they can also see why it is so hard to stay motivated about it when you have a mountain of weight to lose and waning energy for doing simple things like brushing your teeth, getting a shower, etc. If only it were as easy mentally to eat less and move more. I guess that IS the easy part, getting there in your head is the hard part.

4athomej said...

All I can say is I'm sorry that happened to you...but now that your laughing I'm LMAO!!! :)

bbubblyb said...

I would have told him that about strapping on the 100 lbs but I'm sure he would have probably had a snippy come back. I'm glad that there are trainers that have had a weight problem in their life, I've met a few. I think all should have compassion if nothing else, they are there to help ALL people that want help after all.

My family is bad about laughing when stuff like that happens and I confess I couldn't help myself reading your story lol. Of course I would have felt terrible for you and helped you collect your quarters but still glad it wasn't me though I know all to well about falling (I use to be good at it) lol. Way to go on bowing I wouldn't have been that brave. Way to go on the award.

M Pax said...

That is a great story! Thank you for sharing it.

We have to find our own zen place so that we don't care about other judgements.

I deal with it every day ... almost. I've lost the weight, but my new career has me stepping in it constantly. Losing the weight taught me so much. I don't think I could deal with this so well otherwise. :)

Ice Queen said...

Ah... The joys of public humiliation. Talk about a character builder. lol

Miss Marilee said...

Omg...DYING laughing!!!! So...there's this horrible bowler....and her name is Marilee Hicks. She gets excited when she breaks 40....she's usually around 20....and she has been known to bowl a strike...in the lane next to her. Also known as I love bowling but am horrible at it! This just made me giggle sooooooo hard!!! I love embarrassing bowling stories.

Melissa said...

I couldn't help but giggle at this story.

You totally deserve the award.

Putz said...

i just wish you had eaten 1473 calories todya so i wound't have to worry about you being hungry tonight>>>.but i loave your stories, you see i am a putz and i tell stories, most of my life i have been a putz, a penis, a buffoon, a character and all my storuies end up p[eople laughing at me, so you used to be a putzette by the way only half my comments make it to publication cause your computer does not work properly but i love you anyway

Lindsay said...

great story thanks for sharing! LOVE it!!

Linda Pressman said...

You are so right, Chris. Just imagine someone with a severe weight problem coming face to face with that clerk's judgement and sneer. They would give up before they even started. A person needs to have someone who's walked this path, who understands what it's like to feel like you can't walk around the block, or to know you actually have muscles under the fat.

Christy said...

You are definitely right. People who have never had to deal with weight problems just don't get it. For a lot of people who find themselves overweight, they just don't know how to lose the weight, or what they need to do - sounds silly, but that is exactly how I was. I had no idea the amount of calories I was supposed to be eating, or how much or what kind of exercises I should be doing.