4.27.2010

Remove the word 'choice'

That is what I did.
When I started my 'new life'.
My 'weight loss journey'.
My 'exercise regimen'.

I removed the word choice from my brain.
Good choices...That is Seans phrase...and it's a good one.
He uses it in the context of eating 1500 calories or less a day.
(now 1800 I think)
There was no choice to make about limiting calories.
His choices now all come within the confines of preset barriers to behavior.

So.
I eat daily.  I have to, there is no CHOICE.
I could choose not to eat..but that would be a stupid choice.
I am not cut out for anorexia anyway.
To me, before I paid any attention to what I was eating (or prior to May of last year)...
I thought I was exercising free will.
But I wasn't consciously choosing...I was shoveling in any old thing.
There was no thought involved unless it was bad thoughts about my body.
There were no parameters for my eating.
I started this whole journey with two paremeters.
One was "No more than 1800 calories a day"
(except for my one higher calorie day)
And the other was exercise for one hour a day, six days a week.

You may wonder..."Why does she go at it so hard all the time."
I choose to.
But also...the new parameters I set for myself is one hour of exercise minimum...six days a week.
Cardio suppresses the appetite.
That is why I do at least one hour a day.
I am not going to rely on my mythical willpower to get me through anything.
I have been there, done that..and .had the 3x tshirt.
Now, do I have choices...
yes.
I could chuck my paremeters and say...
"I refuse to be bound by artificial requirements such as calorie counting and exercising."
In fact...at one point that is how I lived my life.
Which was why I was so fat.
The point is..everything in life is a trade off.
I am willing to trade in parties in my mouth whenever, and wherever, and however I wanted...
To lose weight, feel healthy and whole...and to live again.

.
Here is my theory in a nutshell.
If you want success, if you want to win.
Half *ssed effort will not suffice.
Doing the minimum.  Going halfway.
Seeing what I can 'get by with'.
It's not how I roll.
Alix wanted to know why I do 210 situps three days a week.
It seems excessive.
I know she doesn't want me wearing myself out.
But for me...it's empowering.
It's liberating.
It shows ME who is the boss.
Like I said before.
Before I start I say OUT LOUD:
"To discipline the mind and the body".
It is a deliberate act of the will.
I do it when I am sick and when I am healthy.
It is me controlling my destiny.
There is no 'choice' to be made.
I have decided that this is who I am and this is what I do.
I eat to live.
I exercise to train my body.
I don't need any qualifiers...there is no second option.
To give myself another option is to cheat myself, my spouse and my children out of the kind of mother I am capable of being.
I refuse to do that.
It's all in my hands.
What I can control I will control.
No excuses.
Hugs,
Chris

13 comments:

Robin said...

I like that... What I can control I will control. Everyone can embrace that.

Tammy said...

Oh yes...my goodness....Robin is right...excellent phrase. I love this post.....just fantastic. :)

Holly said...

That is how I have started my weight loss journey...full force. I keep wondering when I am going to crash and burn but, after just one month I still feel as excited as I did the day I started, if not more because now I am seeing results.

And..."party in your mouth" love it!

The_Exquisite_Christine said...

I half assed it for years. It was called "maintaining". And maintaining 200 lbs don't cut it. Standing here at 150 I can tell you it was worth it to step it up a notch. No choice, no excuses. Just DELIBERATE action! Thanks for the situp mantra. I love my new inner tape too. ♥

Deb Willbefree said...

Well said. Deb

Putz said...

please, please eat when you get hungry so i don't have to worry about you

TJ said...

My Fav line, "Half *ssed effort will not suffice" SO TRUE!

Thanks for the support Chris- you my friend will get to your goal before me, but I will be making my way there slowly but surely! :)

Amber said...

Great post!

Thanks for the link! I checked out her blog and it's great.
I really needed her post today!

Thanks Chris!

Linda Pressman said...

I love this, Chris! I made certain decision too, nearly ten years ago now. What my food plan would be, what my exercise would be, what foods I simply couldn't be near again, ever. The only thing that's really changed about this over time is that I've upped the exercise!

Blue~ said...

When I really thought about what you were saying it seemed a really convoluted idea - choice or no choice. I guess there is one choice - life or death. All stops in between are sorta based on that I guess, and how much you value one over the other.

My Big Fat Super Super Obese Blog said...

Love this post Chris. You've watch me personally half ass it (I can't even say I was half assing it lol...I was giving a lot of lip service, but not getting a heck of a lot done this past year). Thank you for continuing to believe in me and support me and share your diet guru wisdom with me ;) xx

Helen said...

In my experience, half-assing it only gets you a bigger ass in the long run.

And, I love Exquisite Christine's comment that half assing it was called maintaining!

Seth said...

I was talking with my mom the other night and it was about weight loss and working out -- and she said i was obsessed. My wife said, "if it's an obsession it's a good one". I thought about it and said - nope, this is a way of life, not an obsession.

This time I use your words.

I choose to.