Where are you going?

What I really should have said with yesterdays post.
This is why I shouldn't write when I am fuzzy.
I will give two examples.
You want to go to california...
You get in the car and take off...
without looking at a map or even where your destination is...
You are going to have problems.
The very, very least you can do is look at a map of the us and decide to  head west...
California is a big state.
You will probably hit it at some point.
That is what setting a calorie cap and exercising daily will do for you.
I read a story yesterday about people who had lost massive amounts of weight,
They had gotten down to 'thin'.
Then they were disappointed because their lives didn't magically transform into fairyland.
One woman wrote "I was still a fat girl, in a thin girl's body."
Which leads me to believe that perhaps fat is more a mental state than a physical one.
Don't get me wrong...fat is obviously a physical manifestation.
But You get my point.
She had gastric bypass.
She lost a ton of weight.
She still felt the same.

I don't think that is where we all want to go.
Different body, same destination.
The thing is, I am not done losing yet, and I am a totally different person.
I think I do need to go back and reread my posts.
But When I started my thoughts were
"I am too smart to be stuck this fat'.
'If that bimbo can be thin, what is stopping me?"
I didn't JUST want to be thin.
I wanted to experience life.
I didn't want to be afraid of trying new things anymore.
I didn't want to stand in the back and stay out of the way anymore.
I didn't want to be judged solely on my appearance anymore.
I finally realized that people believe what they see.
I finally realized that  people like, respect and admire people who like, respect and admire themselves.
My destination wasn't just thin.
It was life.
So what I am saying is...
Know what it is you are shooting for.
You may not want to be super fit.
Just healthy enough to enjoy daily activities.
You may be shooting for size 14...
You may be shooting to run in a 10 K and to fit in a parachute harness.
Set a Goal..Set a destination.
Know what you want.
It will make it a lot easier to hit the mark.
If you know where you are headed, and WHY you are going,
It will make saying no to fatty foods easier.
Because instead of seeing what you're missing,
You can see what you are one step closer to gaining.
I wanted to gain control over my body.
I wanted just once, to look at my body as a product of my efforts,
and be proud of what I created.

I want to never again (unless it's outside of my control) be subject to a body that is too sickly to enjoy life.
I want my body to be a help, not a hindrance.
That is what I am aiming for.
Now, second
You have to let go of what you have to grab on to what you want:
What's one of the easiest ways to catch a monkey?
Put peanuts in a jar, and tie the jar to a tree, then wait. Before too long, a monkey will come along, notice the jar, and go over to check it out. Seeing and smelling the peanuts, he'll reach in his hand and grab a fist-full.
Since his hand is in a fist and is full of peanuts, it will not fit through the mouth of the jar, so his hand will be stuck he won't be able to get his hand out of the jar that is tied to the tree.
The monkey will let himself be caught by the hunter rather than let go of the peanuts.
Is the monkey afraid? Yes. He'll be screaming and trying his best to get away. But he knows he has something good and pleasant in his grasp, and he is determined to take that good thing with him as he runs away or TRIES to run away.
The monkey does not understand that letting go of the peanuts is the only way to save himself.

There is no choice about letting go of the food.
That is what I meant.
You can't keep the same relationship with food.
You have to let it go.
You have No choice.   

After that decision, the choices are endless....the possibilities limitless.  But if you don't let go of the food...you will stay stuck.
Chris out...


Helen said...

Word up girlfriend.

SeattleRunnerGirl said...

I swear you are in my head today...I just wrote a post about this! Thank you for sharing and reminding me how important knowing my destination is!

Jack Sh*t, Gettin Fit said...

I'm sorry, but that does not sound like a very easy way to catch a monkey. I don't have a lot of empty jars sitting around, so I gotta eat all the pickles (cuz monkeys don't like pickles).

But you're on to something with the rest of this. People who are here to simply lose weight may not find the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow they expect. Chances are, they'll gain it back even if they wind up accomplishing the task at hand.

A life-change, however... that's something entirely different. I'm so happy to be on this road with you, my friend.

JourneyBeyondSurvival said...

LOve your message. Because I'm not in this for an end of the goal number. I'm in it for a life change. I can't be healthy this way.

Brightcetera said...

I saw a message on a billboard yesterday that said ...
"What you see depends on what you're looking for."

It's much easier to see the cup as full and the positive aspects of our goals as you pretty much said here.
I can easily slip in to the habit of pining for what I'm missing in the short term i.e. a food I'm craving rather than what I'm missing in the long term ... a fit, healthy body that takes me to places I've only dreamed of.

Hope you're having a great day, Chris, in your ever evolving, slimmer body! ♡

LauraLynne said...

I love the monkey story..it's perfect. thank you.
I've got misty eyes - it really hit home.
thank you.

Aylilth said...

Very well said!!!!

Anonymous said...

You know, I've said what you just said (although not as well) on my own post several times.

Each tiime, I've gotten one or two responses from people who took the position that I was just copping out of weight loss--that the numbers are the point & I was losing focus.

Reading this message from you, reading it in some one else's words and style, convinces me that the message is true.

If I get to the end of the Highway to Thin and am only thin, I will be disappointed. I will have wasted the opportunity for growth that the journey held.



Anonymous said...

It's good to see someone else who read that article and said, "DUH."
I lost 125 lbs and gained 70 back because I didn't fix my head.
I'd venture to say 99% people who regain do the same.
I'm just amazed at how many people still don't see the connection.

Anonymous said...

Spot on Chris!

Robin said...

And this is why I continue to read your posts. It can be about losing weight or...not. It can simply be about changing your life. Choices choices choices.

Anonymous said...

Chris, you are bringing up a good point in this post. Many people make the physical change, but not the mental change. In fact, Deniz posted a similar thought today. If we don't change our mental state, all the success in the world physically doesn't really matter.

Unknown said...

another great post! :) stooooopid monkeys! lol

Lindsay said...

Perfectly stated!!!

outdoor.mom said...

very encouraging :-)

kellidee said...

what a good post..i like it..and yes i like the monkey story..lol

Seth said...

Got to let it go!

I've also heard of hunters cutting a coconut in half -- putting a peeled orange in the middle. Put the coconut back together and cut a small hole just big enough for the monkeys hand -- you can figure the rest.

same method, different tools. Much like weight loss. Keep it up Chris.

J Rodney said...

"My destination wasn't just thin.
It was life."

That is one great destination.

I think my destination is to be FREE! Free of that heavy burden of being just a tad overweight, just a tad heavy....that burden of hiding myself under a swim skirt, when I take my boys to the beach on the weekends. Freedom to live life like I want it...that's what I want.
The Fit & Frugal Challenge

Anne H said...

Love this story, no matter how many times I hear it or apply it. And it almost always applies!